perhaps it is something of a “balancing act,” that if naturally, or innately occurring in you - given the radical (don’t mean in a negative sense) / extraordinary amount of change that has happened, or occurred in a relatively short period of time. That’s a lot for anyone to adjust to, m. i., or not... And especially when considering where you were before that, and everything you’ve gone through.
so in short, this doesn’t sound so surprising to me — this reaction you’re having , or experiencing of sorts. In fact, it almost seems normal were I to place myself in your shoes. And in so doing, what would worry me —(or concern me most, rather); is this thing you’re referencing & referring to. Because I could then see myself following through on, or with it almost without a care in the world.
Which would obviously not be a desirable outcome, or thing.
And that is why, I suggested what I’d suggested at the beginning - worst thing that could happen, they say “chill & dont fret- stand pat you’ve got nothing to worry about, etc.” or maybe they can bump your appointment up a little sooner. Or something in between? : ) regardless, good luck 🍀👍