Can you really choose to be happy?

[lalaland]

I saw this article about the 5 things people regret the most on the death beds. The 5 things was listed by a nurse who take care of patients with terminal illness. Anyways the last one day you can choose to be happy... ermmm really? I really don't know how to do that... and don't think it's possible when you have little serotonin in your head.

Here's what the article says:
5) I wish I had let myself be happier
This is a very humbling one, really.

Many of her patients didn’t realise until the end of their lives that happiness is a choice.

They wished they had known that happiness isn’t something to be chased and acquired through wealth, social acceptance and the trappings of life.

In their deathbeds, these patients realized they could have chosen to be happy, regardless of their circumstances in life – rich or poor.

To me, this regret is the most touching.

Throughout our active lives, we often focus too much on acquiring the things we would like to have – wealth, status, power and achievement. We often (wrongly) believe that these things hold the keys to our happiness.

When asked what they could have done differently, here’s the key message those dying folks shared: Learn to relax and appreciate the good things in your life. That’s the only way to find real happiness.

Happiness is a choice.

 

[panda-]

Yeah hindsight is always 20/20, maybe I'd say the same thing too because it's an easy thing to say when you're not actually reliving it....let's say I wanted to give this a try, to choose happiness....when can I chose to be happy? When I'm working in a dirty labor job 40 hours a week on no sleep? or maybe I can choose to be happy when I'm a cleaning my house like cinderella, or running errands, or taking my kid to school in the early morning when I've gone to bed at 4 am. Maybe I can choose to be happy as a single parent that never gets to see her kid due to having to work a late shift. I work a job I hate on stupid hours to take care of my child who I never see and my free time is spent taking care of everyone else's needs first. It's not a lack of wanting to choose happiness, my happiness has been robbed from me by my own poor decision making. You want to know what I'd regret if I was on my death bed, not making better life decisions. I feel like alot of people's depression is circumstance, it's not always chemical. I feel like if I had a better life I'd be happy, if I had money I'd be happy. I could stay home with my kid, see her after school and ask her how her day was, eat dinner with her. That would make me happy, unfortunately I cant just quit my job because the way we function as a society has me in a check mate.

 

[Zonkers]

I wish finding happiness was as easy as just choosing to be. I guess in a way I do make a choice to be happy as it is my facade. But that doesn't necessarily mean that I truly feel happy. I don't know about most people but I don't long for riches, traveling all over the world, or fame and glory; I don't think happiness is found in these things. I want to find happiness in my current situation, and right now simply choosing to be happy is not enough.

 

[Lara_C]

I think it is a choice, but we also need to find out how to be happy and that's not always obvious, or easy.

 

[may71]

I think it's fair to say that sometimes people can choose to be happy by changing their priorities and outlook, but it's not always that easy. Certainly being grateful for what you've got can make you feel better, but that alone isn't necessarily going to get rid of all of your problems.

Your physical and mental health, your relationships, and your finances are all relevant to your happiness. Those things aren't necessarily easily changed. In most cases, there's a way to make those things better, but it usually takes some work.

I think that most people here have more substantial problems that can't be solved just by choosing to see life and the world differently. That's not to say that looking at things differently couldn't help a little, but just that there's probably more to it.

 

[BarryW]

5) I wish I had let myself be happier

I've heard this sort of thing before and I have to admit I do not understand it. My brain cannot process this statement. I could understand something like "I wish i hadnt worried so much about things that didnt matter" or "I wish I spent more of my free time with people I liked" but i don't know what it means to let oneself be happier (esp since it implies you have some degree of happiness already) . As if there is like 100 gallons of happiness inside me and i just have to take the lid off. But, thanks lalala for sharing what you read.