In the last couple of weeks, I have had a XXX several times and had it pressed into my flesh several times as well. I feel my life is out of control and the only way I feel I have any control is to do these sorts of things. I know its wrong, and I hate feeling this way. I am trying to get help but the counsellor does not seem to help me. I want to scream some days!!! I have money trouble in that I will have no job come summer, and I have many debts gone to collections. I fear I will lose my girlfriend. I am now living at home. I also fear I will do something to myself. I have a 9 year old daughter and leaving her alone with her crazy mother (we split long ago) is the only reason I am alive. I hear that sucide messes a kid up. I hate feeling this way and want to do something-any advice?