I hate my life. I hate myself I cant do anything right. All i ever do is wrong All i ever say is wrong All i ever do is make others lives miserable Enough is enough... i give up.. i freeking give up... I am a wasted piece of crap that walks upon this hell hole we call Earth.. Talk about being in Hell Hell i am in Hell.. My brother ... screw you , screw you for hanging up on me , calling me and then just starting an argument with me.. thats what it was all about , you didnt call to check on me , you called to start an argument.. you knew i was church of Christ , you knew i didnt listen to instrumental music and you diliberatly played it thinking you were all high and mighty because you had just got saved, well my dear brother if you had gotten saved you would have known better then to hang up on me anger does not match a christian at least none i can think of or know of does.. All my other family members , screw you,, screw you all.. you never cared for me.. you have never sent me a birthday card, never sent any gifts , my gosh you never came to visit me when i was in the hospital with heart problems in sparta, the only one who did come was two ministers , one from sparta and David dalton.. of whom both really only came because of their image as a minister.. And you Mr. Dalton and Mrs Dalton , what about you? You call yourself a christian yet you refuse to help me mend the fences, you refuse to help me ease my mind.. you refuse to do what God has commanded.. you teach one thing then practice another.. What are you gonna do? Just what are you gonna do when you hear of my death? what are you gonna do when you see me in that casket? you cant help me ease my mind then.. it will be too late too freeking late... why couldnt you? why couldnt you help me to ease my mind? This is not a joke.. it is real very real and the facts remain the same. it is truth and God knows it.. he knows the pain i have , he knows the emotional drain it is putting upon me and my soul.. I have given it up to him.. he has control now and i pity you.. i really pity you cause you dont know just how short a time you have to help me ease my mind... My spirit is going to be lingering in this stupid dying body of mine because of you.. i have tried being nice.. i have pleaded and pleaded but you got no heart.. no heart at all.. i am hurt.. i am deeply hurt because every single night i have to lay down in a bed and wonder why are you both keeping me in this torment.. every single night you let it continue it will be on your head.. These may very well be my last words and i can only ask God to forgive you and have mercy upon you both or at the least go easy on you.. May God forgive you cause you are adding hurt instead of taking it away , every time you dont call , every day that goes by , you are adding more hurt.. well my hurting is stopping , it is stopping soon..