Can't feel anithing but pain!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Carlos48, Feb 1, 2014.

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  1. Carlos48

    Carlos48 New Member

    Sorry but English is not my first language: So I will try to explain a little bit of my self. Im 48 and I have nothing lost everithing from family to material things. And all because of me, bad son bad husband and bad father. I can't blame anybody but my self. And now Im okay with that because I dont feel to bad about ending my life, Idont wan to wake up every morning and start thinking about my mistakes and the loser that I am, I know I deserve this. But Knowing this does not help me with the pain. I have three childrens and told them to stay away from me because I could keep my chin up an look at their faces. And I dont wan them to feel sorry for me. Im selfish with a very low self-esteem. The worse part is that on the out side I look the opposite of this everybody think Im okay. I have some family that cares about me but its me who give a S@#T any more. Ibeen suicidal for long time when I felt depress but I was sacre about it, and now Im scare no more, I feel like this world will be okay with out me and will stop my head from my thoughts.....
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    YOUR CHILDREN WILL NOT BE ALRIGHT with you leaving you will just be passing on your sadness to them and giving them the suicidal trait as well. I have often said when someone suicides they took only take their life they take many with them and it is true You can go to hospital and get treatment and get back some self esteem by knowing you are doing everything you can to help your children see there are other ways and suicide is not one of them not when there is help and support for you
     
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Total Eclipse is right, there's help out there, and it's worth reaching out for that help. Nothing would be more difficult or painful for your children than if you were to end your own life. That's a hurt that never heals.
     
  4. Carlos48

    Carlos48 New Member

    Thank you total eclipse and wildcherry, I'll try every day thinking about what you say.
     
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