Can't get over it

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by MartinSL, May 18, 2011.

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  1. MartinSL

    MartinSL Member

    Everytime I think I'm through it, I get back into depression. I hit the bottom of the barrel last night and I thought it was time to end it all. I called the crisis line and it kept me alive for one more night. I can't stop thinking about my ex. I can't stop thinking about what it was like when I was happy, when I was loved. I feel so alone. I am alone. No one cares about me and my problems. I just feel like a burden for everyone around me. I hate myself and what I have become. I'm supposed to take an appointment tonight for professionnal help but in the end I doubt that'll help at all. If it fails, I don't know what I'll do. I'm scared.
  2. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    Please dont give up, why not make the appointment. I know it seems like they cannot help (as trust me ive been dragged the system enough) but there are people out there who do care about you and there are people here at the forum who care aswell xx please take care of you xx Amy
  3. Crash106

    Crash106 Member

    Things change. Good things end and that makes us happy. Bad times end and that, at least, breaks the chain of sadness. Before, you felt happy, maybe now you are hopeless, but things do change. You can take hope in that.

    I suggest you remember the good times and forget the bad times. Celebrate your accomplishments.
    Learn from your mistakes.

    Sometimes it's enough to just breath.
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    When you go to your appointment be honest and tell all..They can't help you unless your honest with them..As far as your ex goes it sounds like you are still in the greiving stage, when you move to the anger stage it is much easier to let go..I greived over my ex for about a year.. Then the anger set in...She ripped me off for $18,000..I found out she got married three months after we split up..The guy is old enough to be her father..
  5. MartinSL

    MartinSL Member

    I I ended up showing to the ER the day after my post. The guy asked me why I am here: suicidal thoughts and depression. Only took a few hours till he told me to get my coat and head outside. Made me get into one of those short white bus and took me some place I could only describe as Shutter's Island. I was kinda scared to be honest... lol.. wasn't sure where I was at all. After a few interviews, I was diagnosed with deep depression. I now have some prescription for meds and have an off-work paper signed for 2 weeks. I'm at work at the moment but it all feels too heavy. I'm still wondering what's the best: stay off work but alone or stay here, depressed, but surrounded with people.
  6. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    which ever makes you feel better. if being with others helps then stay there. Doctors are ok but most of the time your just a number. did they ask you if you wanted to be off work?
    I hope you are starting to feel better x take car of you xx
  7. msu1980

    msu1980 Member

    One of the things that I have experienced in my treatment is that the healthcare system in the United States is, at best, inadequate to deal with persons who suffer from depression or other mental illnesses. Its been my experience that I was always passed off to the next person and then the next and so on and so on.

    The current system needs reform and in my opinion, a complete overhaul. The current health care system is overwhelmed which puts non priority or life threatening illnesses on the back burning.

    Keep this in mind, things WILL get better. You did not fall into a deep depression overnight and it will take time to understand what you are going through and find the treatment that will work.

    I don't want to seem like a total pessimist as there ARE great doctors in the mental health field, unfortunately you may have contact with non caring doctors before you find your match.
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