Cant go on like this

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Milly, Sep 17, 2008.

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  1. Milly

    Milly Well-Known Member

    have been really down at the moments and have once again found myself thinking itd just be better to end it all. was having a really dark day today and was having a rubbish day workwise and i found myself thinking very seriously about walking out there and then as i wouldnt be needing my job and the arses that i work with anyway! no idea what stopped me walking out, and ive no idea whats making me sit and type this into my pc !?!?!?
     
  2. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Milly,
    Can you think of what the thoughts were to get you irritated which probably sent you spiraling down!! You have come to the right place for advice and support.
    Can you tell us more about what is going on? You don't have to worry here because just about every one I have met are very kind. Is your job causing all this? If so then find another one. You don't have to take shit off anyone. I know alot of employers Use your position as leverage to get you to do what they want. Anyhow I am just shooting in the dark because I have no info on what all is happening with you. I'll stop because It isn't fair to you to have me just guessing!! Take Care and post us with some info!!:chopper:!!
     
  3. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    Hiya,

    Welcome to SF.

    Sorry to hear you're feeling so down at the moment. If you ever want to talk about how you're feeling I'll be here to listen.

    Take care & stay safe :hug: xx
     
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    What stopped you was probably the realization that deep down, death is not what you really want. You said today was a dark day. We all experience those at one time or another. Sometimes they last only a short time. These are the ones we get through and carry on. Others continue for longer periods of time. Feelings of hopelessness and dispair are prevalent and it feels like there is no other way out. But there is. the thoughts will change eventually if you can hang on long enough and keep your mind open enough to allow them to. Please don't give in to these urges. New days are around the corner. Who knows what they may bring? :hug:
     
  5. Milly

    Milly Well-Known Member

    maybe, death isnt the answer but its a solution that means i never have to wake up and feel worthless and full of self hate and loathing again, i have good friends that i know would be there for me, and a couple of family members that also would but i just feel so desolate and lonely and feel that i cant turn to them and even if i could what would i say? and id only end up convincing myself that what ever they say would just be "kind words" as they cant really turn round in my hour of need and say "yes you are worthless and pathetic". ive got to the end of my tether with it, everytime that i get even a small glimmer of happiness in life, life seems to throw me back down lower than the last time and just dont feel i can get through the feelings this time. yeah i know it sound like im feeling a bit sorry for myself and should just pull myself together but it just seems that ill always feel this way and i dont want to.

    i dont suppose it helps that i have a job that i hate, an alcoholic mother, ever looming financial hardship and the sudden but unexplained breakdown of the relationship with my girlfriend who i adore. i could go on listing problem after problem but... it seems weird putting this up on a forum!!

    Im scared but strangely calm
     
  6. Milly

    Milly Well-Known Member

    Today was another day where the slightest problem made me want to calmly walk out, get on my bike and never go back because if im not going to be alive then why worry about where the next £ is comming from! ive never felt the feelings of suicide being the answer this strongly before.
     
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