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can't go on

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by coffeekitten, Jun 26, 2010.

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  1. coffeekitten

    coffeekitten Active Member

    I am 5 foot 2 and 155lb. I look like a hideous monster. I feel sick looking at myself in the mirror. I used to be anorexic, and people could say i am just imaging it, but no i AM overweight now, and i AM disgusting. so disgusting, you would want to throw up if you saw me naked. I cry looking in the mirror. I want to starve myself but my boyfriend monitors my food intake and makes me eat SO much. it sickens me. I go to the gym and work out alot, but i am still so gross and fat.

    I am in pain so much of the time, have terrible headaches, and feel sick to the point of throwing up when i go out anywhere, and i don;t know why. I hate doing anything. nothing is enjoyable anymore.

    I want to die. I really want to find a painless way of dying so i can just fall asleep and never wake up...
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 26, 2010
  2. Autumnal

    Autumnal Member

    Tell your boyfriend to fuck off. Get your weight back down to where you want it can go find another penis.
  3. lifelover

    lifelover Well-Known Member

    I used to be very fat too. I never had a girlfriend. My best friend killed himself and i saw him hanging in the rope. I have a phobic disturb. I was afraid of everthing. Oh, and i wanted to die.
    So i went to gym and burned the fat. I went to college and at first i tried to focus on the lessons and not wheter people were looking at my fat face... Later on i made friends there. I started to read books. I started to enjoy coffee in the morning. And fuck everthing else. I feel that you overwhelm your problems. Work hard on the things you want to improve and later on you will feel an awesome relief. And consult a terapist, want to die for "only" feel ugly is not by any standards a healthy atitude.
    (sorry for my english, if you speak portuguese feel free to pm me)
  4. coffeekitten

    coffeekitten Active Member

    ...I think this was the wrong forum to post on. I have posted on the eating disorder one now. how do i delete this??
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Just ask a moderator to delete the thread. :hug:
  6. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    I just want to say that being the best human being though a kind word, a hug, and a friend to people makes your gorgeous in my eyes. The outside doesn't matter. If it will make you feel better to lose some weight, that is fine. Here are some easy and healthy tips that will help tremendously.

    Drink more water, water pushes out waste, and shrinks skin back in place.
    Slowly and steadily be more active, do not over do it to where you are sore.
    Eat half of what you would normally eat at every meal ,and up the vegetables and fruits.
    Make a rule to never eat 4-6 hours before bed. This will make your body rely on stored fat to live off of while you sleep. It may be tough the first couple of days, but after that it will get better.
    Drop soda like a bad habit. It is just sugar water, and who needs that?
    Do not eat sweets but on weekends.
    Stop eating pork. Pig meat is all fat, who needs that?

    These things will give you dramatic results. I know you can do it! Blessings..
  7. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I went on a meat and salad diet..I would cook the meat on the BBQ and cut it up and putit in a salad.. I lost 29 lbs..Then my sister started buying all these deserts and I couldn't resist so I gained the weight back..I agree with the other poster to stay away from sodas.. I use to be a pepsiholic, Thats where I gained alot of my weight.That and no exercise because I am an isolationist..Try the meat and salad diet..
  8. drendil

    drendil Active Member

    I went on South Beach Diet..lost 14lbs in my first week...and i don't exercise. you eat 6 times a day..you aren't hungry...If you can handle the no carbs for 2 weeks then i would recommend it..it gets you off the sugar cravings..and it teaches the right foods to eat and which to avoid..in the end i lost 35 lbs and i'm keeping it off..and again that was with no increased exercise..you can do this..
    if you can't go without the carbs then just go on the phase 2 of the plan that includes carbs..good luck!!!
  9. Ldub20

    Ldub20 Well-Known Member

    One thing that's making me feel better is the fact that I don't have to worry about weight problems...yet.

    But I'd rather have weight problems than have Asperger's. At least larger people can socialize better than I can.
  10. coffeekitten

    coffeekitten Active Member

    why do people always assume fat people stuff there face? I go to the gym almost every day and eat about 1300 calories a day or less.
  11. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    I think that is a common assumption as most people who get depressed eat more and well I for one exercise very little
    well I must say for awhile if you want to shed some pounds you have to eat less calories..eat very healthy mind you but maybe drop t he calorie intake and of course up the exercise if this does not work check with your doctor please..you could have a low thyroid level and that will do it to you for sure ...a very frustrating condition but very very treatable. You did not mention how old you are so maybe there are other health issues that are age related and are affecting your metabolism and thus ability to lose weight...also fat content is a big issue too.

    Remember beauty is on the insdie and you seem like a kind person and therefore a beautiful person.

    Are you getting any help for you sadness and poor self image...maybe talk to your doctor about that too.

    We are here for you so please continue to post so we can support you efforts.

    Hugs BAmbi
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