cant let it go

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by tealeaf, Feb 13, 2009.

  1. tealeaf

    tealeaf Member

    Yea I think im just messed up and I don’t know if it’s the fault of my ex or its me for letting him turn me this way, I cant let the past go I cant, I try , right now im in a place where I want nothing to do with a yr ago I was engaged about to have a baby, money in the bank going to school and good job skip ahead a yr later, I had to move away from all my friends , lost the baby me and bf broke up he now hates me and wants nothing to do with me. I have NO FRIEDS none at all, they all abandoned me in the time when I needed them most. I thought I found love with someone else but he up and dropped me like I was nothing, I just don’t know what to do, I have bad anxiety some days im fine and I think that everything is going to be ok that ill get though this but I have those days where I just want to kill myself, I know I wont I don’t have the guts to do it and plus I would never put my mom through that she has been though enough in here life, I wont hurt her by having her bury her daughter. I just wish I could forget, I don’t understand how ppl can just cast ppl aside like they were nothing to them. I cant do that when I care about ppl I care about ppl and I just cant forget about them like that but it seems like everyone in my life have done that to me, they just forgot.
  2. LastCrusade

    LastCrusade Well-Known Member

    you need more time to recover from your grief. take it easy. it's difficult after what happenned but u need to 'learn' to let go. distract yourself by going out shopping or do whatever you have always wanted to do when u are alone. indulge in yourself a little bit. Give urself a break. even machines breakdown, what more human beings like us.
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Tealeaf,
    Sounds like you have had a rough time of it..Why don't you think about seeing a therapist. They can teach you the five steps of greif and teach you how to cope with it all. Not everything in this world is bad, you can recover from this and start a new life. Your friends suck for abandoning yoou when you need them the most. Try to stay active because if you start isolating with all these feelings they are just going to stagnate and you will become bitter. I hope you seek the help because you sound like a very nice person who wqas dealt a bad hand..Good luck!!!
  4. tealeaf

    tealeaf Member

    Ty so much really appreciate it. They thing is I am isolated, not by choice but I am where I am I have no one but I have to be here for financial reason I can’t go back to where it’s familiar. I don’t even think if I did go back I would have anyone waiting for me. You how ppl sometimes ask themselves, who did this happen? I ask myself that and I can tell u the exact date that everything went to hell