Yea I think im just messed up and I don’t know if it’s the fault of my ex or its me for letting him turn me this way, I cant let the past go I cant, I try , right now im in a place where I want nothing to do with a yr ago I was engaged about to have a baby, money in the bank going to school and good job skip ahead a yr later, I had to move away from all my friends , lost the baby me and bf broke up he now hates me and wants nothing to do with me. I have NO FRIEDS none at all, they all abandoned me in the time when I needed them most. I thought I found love with someone else but he up and dropped me like I was nothing, I just don’t know what to do, I have bad anxiety some days im fine and I think that everything is going to be ok that ill get though this but I have those days where I just want to kill myself, I know I wont I don’t have the guts to do it and plus I would never put my mom through that she has been though enough in here life, I wont hurt her by having her bury her daughter. I just wish I could forget, I don’t understand how ppl can just cast ppl aside like they were nothing to them. I cant do that when I care about ppl I care about ppl and I just cant forget about them like that but it seems like everyone in my life have done that to me, they just forgot.