I don't believe I am frustrated because of feeling good. I am not on any drugs at all right now, have been off anti depressants for the past 2 months, aren't drinking and feel GREAT. I love my body, my face, what friends I have and the prospects for the future. I can't believe I have posted on a suicide forum, contemplating death. The problem is, I know I will fall back into depression. I felt like this about 2 weeks ago and it was great, but only lasted a day or 2 until some sort of external stimuli plunged me back into my usual, sad state. I'll make a mistake at work, say something stupid, feel I look stupid or something. Do I need thicker skin? Yes. The problem is on the outside I do have thick skin, I never show that anything is getting to me. Genuinely not caring about mistakes and problems is much harder.