can't stop thinking about food

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by aki, Feb 28, 2009.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    I think I'm developing an eating disorder....I'm always thinking about eating, always. It's driving me crazy, to the point of being suicidal. I compare myself to my thin pretty sister (who everyone loves to point out is sooo thin and tall :mad:) I compare the amount she eats to what I eat. I count up calories in my head non stop. I feel absolutely disgusting when I eat, and guilty. I feel happy when I don;t eat but I usually find it impossible to control my cravings :(
    I can't even explain how suicidal this makes me feel :( I'm constantly touching my body, feeling how fat it is, non stop food food food. Damn I wish I could just die :sad:
  2. Vitreledonellidae

    Vitreledonellidae Well-Known Member

    i think you already developed an eating disorder, because from what i read it is taking over your life. I really know how you feel, everything you just said i could have said, tho i would have said it more like a retard. I know how disgusting, dissapointing, suicidal you can feel. I wish i could say something that could help you, but i cant. Anyway you can pm me if you want to talk or something
  3. SadPandaBear

    SadPandaBear Well-Known Member

    there never really is a day that goes by that I dont hate food and wish I could not eat any of it.

    Then if i do I feel so terrible and guilty, and ugly and fat.

    I understand completely.
  4. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    Yes, you have an eating disorder and it will completely control you life if you don't fight it and get some help NOW!
  5. jameslyons

    jameslyons Well-Known Member

    :eek:hmy: !

    That doesn't sound like a good behavior at all! Have you thought about talking with a counselor? Body image issues sometimes pop up like zits --but they're harder to get rid of. :unsure:

    I'm not sure what to say, except... I wouldn't like to see you hurt yourself in any way.

  6. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Have you told anyone in real life, specifially any professionals, how you feel? It may not be an ED, it could be something else, that is subtley different somehow that's pure speculation because I'm not a doc or anything.

    Whatever it is, it is probably masking a greater issue behind it. Do you know what might have caused you to feel so bad?
  7. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    Thank you for the replies :hug:s. It's good to know I'm not alone this, well it's not good at all really :sad: I wouldn't want anyone to feel this way. I haven't told anyone about this :unsure: I should tell a professional I know...but they only seem to want to help the extreme cases, like, I don't make myself sick or anything. And I do eat every day. I haven't actually acted on these thoughts mainly because I'm lazy/have no self control.

    Scum, I think it's because people always comment on my weight. I used to be fat and when I met family members or whatever after not seeing them for a while theyd always say 'oh you've lost weight' or something. And I think my mum and my sister have issues around food; my mum hardly seems to eat, but can eat a whole box of chocolates or whatever by herself. And my sister instilled in me things like, only eat one meal a day or something. Or she'd buy me clothes and go, 'it'll look better on you once you've lost weight.'
    But there could be other things as well. I don't really think it's an eating disorder yet, it could develop into one though.

    Thanks again for the replies.
  8. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    It does sound like you have inherited these unhealthy ideas around eating.

    I agree that often the services only help the extreme cases, and this is where they go wrong. If people went really early on, and got support and help for the issues behind the ED, then many people would be able to avoid falling into a severe ED.

    I do urge you to talk to a doctor if you can because maybe they can help you from a diet side and help you work out a healthy diet. Also, they can potentially help you with the issues behind it. If the doctors won't help you with those aspects (or one of them) then there will be other places you can try for that emotional support and dietary support to help prevent you falling further into the clutches.

    I also just want to say that the severity of eating problems is not an indicator of the distress that someone feels inside, so please make sure you don't minimise how you feel if the professionals are unhelpful.
  9. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    thank you Scum, I will tell the nurse I see about this. :hug:
  10. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Good for you :) Please let us know how you get on.
  11. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    :hug: your sister and family sounds so unhelpful. I do hope you find someone to talk to about how unhappy you're feeling.
  12. wunderwood

    wunderwood Well-Known Member

    You may not be able to be diagnosed a la DSM criteria with an ed, but you are moving in that direction. I don't know your age, but you sound very similar to me in my teen years.

    And yes, I now have an eating disorder... a big fat in and out of treatment and would need to go back now, except I have no insurance or money.

    You are somewhat right, a lot of people don't take anything seriously until it is so out of control and you look like hell. No one took me seriously until my weight started plummeting. But there are people out there that will, I hope you can reach out and find one. If nothing else, shoot me a PM. I know the struggle.
  13. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I cant stop thinking about food either because I am unable to have sex and there are no other real pleasures in life, what is life without food and sex?
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.