I can't stop thinking about death. Every waking minute is spent visualizing my own suicide. I'm so desperate. I can't sleep at night, I can't concentrate on anything else. I feel like my organs are shutting down. Can depression be so bad? I feel numb with sadness and despair. I'm struggling to get through the day. I'm on 40mg of citalopram and 800mg of seroquel. I'm desperate for something to work. What should I do?