So today was a really low point today. Worst I've felt. I laid in bed until like 6pm, I couldn't make myself get out of bed. I felt like crap. All I could do is lay there and think about wanting to be dead. How I hated my life and how everything was falling apart. I lost my job, which sucked but it's life and I wasn't worried, I was going to find a new one. Well it's been a month, nothing yet. And I have car payments, bills, etc. Whatever it sucks. Then like 3 weeks after I lost my job my boyfriend who is in the military decided he couldn't handle being in a relationship right now while he was stationed overseas. He's not deployed, he's just in Japan and I can go see him and was suppose to go see him in March well right now we still talk but I dk what's going to happen. But I was fine until he did this to me and then I just felt like I was going to go off the deep end, trying to balance all the crap on top of taking 4 classes, I can't handle it. I just want it fixed. And I don't want to feel this kind of pain.