Can't...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by tazz, Dec 18, 2010.

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  1. tazz

    tazz New Member

    I just feel horrible all the time. I can't stop.
    I don't think I'm worth it. I don't ever do anything worthwhile, if I died I would of never of done anything to remember. The only thing keeping me here are my younger brother and sisters, I wouldn't want to leave them but I feel like this is my last option.
    I start crying out of no where sometimes, just because I can't keep pretending I'm OK and telling my friends and family I'm fine and nothings wrong. If they knew I was this close to killing myself, it would kill them but I just....can't. I can't.
    If I die, maybe people will realize that something was wrong with me. That I wasn't just really, really, shy. Maybe then they would feel bad for making me feel like I can't ever do anything right. Maybe then someone would say, I should of talked to her, or, I should of asked her what was wrong.
    I think I'm most afraid of trying to kill myself and failing and having to face my family and friends. Then they'd really know how much of a freak I was.
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Cat and welcome...you are not a freak, you are in pain and pain makes us feel and do things we would never consider in other situations...please try to talk to someone...keeping this to yourself is not healthy...and share with us what is going on...there are many of us here who will truly understand...welcome and glad you found us...big hugs, J
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey holding all that pain and sadness inside you only causes you to go deeper into depression can you talk to someone a councillor at school a teacher anyone it will help. Your right your siblings would miss you horrible and you would set them up to comitt suicide too. Please reach out for help now while you are young Call your doctor and get some meds or therapy for your depression but get help now okay so your life can get better. :rose::rose:
     
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