I stole the title of this thread from @JohnADreams's reply in the 'Self Esteem: Getting it, finding it and keeping it' thread. I was reminded by @Ziggy's reply in the same thread how our perceptions design our life, how often we are deluded and suffer for no good reason >If everyone says that a painting is crap I guess there's generally a reason for it, but what if one person likes it? Maybe we're all just waiting to be appreciated by that lone voice in the crowd? There are many people who won't appreciate who you are, but is that your fault or theirs? Maybe I just want to fit in, to belong, to be desired, to conform. Is that right or wrong? I guess that's a different debate.< Also by the words of another member @bubblin girl >...its all the same...the wrong is in me...and im still the same ugly,retarted,stupied person on earth...< It got me thinking. Who made us beleive we are ugly or stupid? Why do we feel the need to belong, to fit in? If I'm convinced that I'm ugly and stupid my chances to fit in anywhere are automatically diminished by half at least. People see us the way we see ourselves. If I don't reply to any compliment or say - Oh no, I'm really not that beautiful/smart/witty or whatever, people will think exactly that. Many times it was our parents who abused and/or neglected us and made us beleive we are unworthy. How do we realize that is not true? Took me so many years. The other thing is that many of us just don't fit in the society's usual perceptions of beatiful/normal, etc. Should we feel less worthy because of that? Who are the people who actually change the world, create art, push the boundaries? Normal, average individuals? I don't think so. Can we feel proud, or at least not ashamed, for being different?