Changing the Outcome of Today

Discussion in 'Strategies for Success' started by Freya, Feb 19, 2015.

  1. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    Emotion is a bitch. I don't believe that people can choose how they feel. If you feel shit you feel shit. You can't force yourself to feel better by force of will alone and I think that everyone here would agree with me.

    You feel shit - so maybe you:
    • Don't get out of bed/go back to bed.
    • Get grumpy and bad tempered with people you care about.
    • Self Harm or engage in substance abuse (yes I am including alcohol on this list)
    • Listen to sad/maudlin music.
    • Google suicide methods.
    • Think about all the things you can't do and all the choices you do not have.
    • Isolate yourself
    • Etc

    Its not your fault. You can't help how you feel. And how you feel is OVERWHELMINGLY SHIT. Its exhausting and debilitating and unimaginably painful. You can't change how you feel.

    You CAN change how you choose to react to it.

    I do not suppose to know everyone's situations. Maybe you are grieving for someone you lost - maybe you are sick - maybe you got fired - maybe you are painfully alone... maybe there is no way to change the eventual outcome of your situation. But you can change the outcome of today. You can choose, today, to react differently to how you feel.

    You can choose, today, to feel what you feel and give yourself a different outcome anyway:
    • You can choose to do activities that keep your mind busy instead of lying in bed and thinking about things you do not feel able to choose,
    • You can choose to celebrate the people you love with happiness and fun instead of isolating or sniping at them,
    • You can choose to Google positive stories instead of suicide methods
    • You can choose to go outside for a walk, or a drive, or a coffee, or a meal, or a game of pool, or see a movie
    • You can choose smile anyway. Laugh anyway. Talk anyway. LIVE anyway.

    And no it is "not that easy" - not as easy as typing it, not as easy as suggesting it... but its easier than feeling sad and angry and depressed and suicidal and hopeless and in pain without respite every single second. It is easier than that.

    Today, you can CHOOSE a different outcome. And when tomorrow comes, you can choose the outcome of that day too. Maybe not all of it - maybe not even most of it - but some of it. Will there be days when you cannot choose the outcome? Of course. Life is like that. But today, tomorrow, most days - you get to choose.

    Just a thought.
  2. Maura

    Maura Member

    Thank you Freya, beautiful and very true.
    It can be so hard to push yourself to do those things, which feel much more difficult than they should be - day in day out, and still feel terrible. I think many people here recognize feeling like whatever you do, you can't change the outcome of the day because after you've tried everything you could think of, nothing seems to work. And so you give up trying after a certain point, because being alone in bed and feeling like shit is somehow easier than doing everything you can to change, being surrounded by friends, doing fun things, smiling till it hurts, and stíll feeling like shit.
    But you're right, and the truth is: if the actions you're taking don't change the outcome of a day, or a week, they will change the outcome of months and years. I'm certain of this, and also certain that it's true for everyone, no matter how hopeless a situation seems. Perhaps you won't be rewarded immediately for what you do, for the battles you fight every day, but in the long run, you will. Thank you for reminding all of us of the choice and power we have <3