I cheated on my boyfriend. We've been together for 7 years, and I just messed everything up. I was with a friend, we kissed and it happened, and I didn't stop it---I should have stopped it. After it was done, I told my friend that I just did something completely wrong, and I had to leave. We cut off all communication. I can't allow myself to be near that person again. I knew it was wrong, and I feel awful. I told my boyfriend when I got home, and he said that I can stay in the house. I don't know how he can stand to look at me. Of course, everything has changed. I didn't know how good I had it until I destroyed it. I don't know why I'm self destructive, but I seem to put myself in situations that are impossible to resolve. I'm overwhelmed by this mistake and feeling very depressed. I was very hungry ordered food, and ate about six bites. I can't bear what I've done to him, what I've done to us. Everything is wrong and there is no fixing this.