ChildFree

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by Forgotten_Man, Jul 3, 2006.

?

Are you ChildFree?

  1. Yes now and forever

    29 vote(s)
    59.2%
  2. No

    8 vote(s)
    16.3%
  3. Only because my Biological clock has not gone off

    2 vote(s)
    4.1%
  4. I like polls

    10 vote(s)
    20.4%
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  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    The next better lifestyle. I am a person who does not believe in bringing more people into this world. Nor do I care to take in an unwanted one either. I am often times considered selfish because I am thinking of what is best for me. Is it so wrong to not want children simply because I don't want the responsibility? Because I can gaurnutee you that it is not just because I am young. I am 21 and still a virgin. I believe so avidly in not having kids that I don't have sex.

    So what should we discuss?
    • Are you Childfree? Why?
    • Is Being Childfree ok or a Bad thing? YOU HAVE TO PICK A POSITION
    • If you are childfree what methods do you use to remain that way?
     
  2. Malcontent

    Malcontent Staff Alumni

    If you don't want children that's fine, but I wouldn't say it's a better lifestyle. Each to their own, the people who want kids should have them and the people who don't don't have to. Personally I can't wait to be a father, (I should be one in November but my finance miscarried). I know I'll be a good father and unfortunately there's not enough of them in this world... No-one has to want kids, but it's not a bad thing to want them either. In my opinion, creating and raising a new life with someone you love is a wonderful thing.
     
  3. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I would think that living a great life with out the burden of another life would be an even more wonderful thing. Because then you are free from the titles and other such things that could come with being a parent.

    Not to mention I notice that many parents these days are RARELY able to raise children no matter HOW much they want them.

    But then again, one day I could just need a source of cheap labor.
     
  4. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    I think it's wise that you've thought this through and are going to ways in which you can't get pregnant and some may see it as selfish, but at the end of the day, there's many, many children out there who are not wanted or loved by their parents and are being subject to abuse whether it be neglect or other when they deserve love and respect. If you're not ready for the responsibility of parenthood then don't have children, or, if you do have children then you could put them up for adoption and let people who are unable to have children the chance to become parents.

    I don't have children and I don't feel ready to have children but in the future, when I'm settled and in a stable relationship, living together... etc it would be good to have children. Right now, I'm still young and am not financially or emotionally ready to progress into parenthood.
     
  5. immure

    immure Account Closed

    i have 4 kids. i think it started the sameway anything started. i was lookin for a sence of some kind that would help furfill me the reason i do most things.

    for me havin kids was a critical thing. it moved me from a attitude of not wanting any attachments and feelin like i had no home where ever i went to litterly lived on street. to havin a better life i am better as a person with kids for i want and will blood sweet and tears love and protect my kids. not to mention i have a home now and it is where ever they are i feel at home for my heart is always with them. i feel like i belong here and have a purpose bigger then my own and i need this to make it in this lifetime.
     
  6. Malcontent

    Malcontent Staff Alumni

    I'm not saying that you personally have to be a parent, but it's what I want. I don't think it's a burden at all. And as someone who has lost a child, it certainly doesn't feel better to be without that other life.

    Yeah, there are some seriously shite parents out there. But most are ok and do a reasonable job. Everyone hates their parents at some point in their life and thinks they did a rubbish job, but if you're alive and they didn't deliberately hurt you I think they've probably done their best. The rest is your resonibility.

    That is not something to be joked about, and I'd thank you not to make comments like that again.
     
  7. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I am never going to be ready that is for sure. There is no reason for me to reproduce anyway, those of us who are inferior don't need to go fucking it up for others as well.

    Yes well chances are if hell freezes over and I do get someone pregnant they will not part with the child so easily and I will be fucked and my life will be ruined as I get labeled a dead beat dad. Lucky for me people see my inferiority and ignore me.

    My friend seems to feel a similar way. I personally don't believe in it but hey what can i do?

    Personally I think that in order for me to enjoy life I need to confirm my existence through myself. Not through another, I don't see any point in living if I cannot find happiness within myself.


    Man I guess all parents, like my mom, need to believe that they did not make any mistakes during their lives. Plus it gives my mom a reason to hate my dad even more.

    In the end my mom did all she could for me. There is no one great way to parent a child. I find that she more than anyone is my inspiration for not having kids after seeing the way me and my sisters got in the way of her dreams.

    What? I cannot make dark jokes. That is funny serisously.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 3, 2006
  8. immure

    immure Account Closed

    My friend seems to feel a similar way. I personally don't believe in it but hey what can i do?

    Personally I think that in order for me to enjoy life I need to confirm my existence through myself. Not through another, I don't see any point in living if I cannot find happiness within myself.

    the funny thing is kids come from with in in the first place.
     
  9. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Only from a female mind you it is much less inside from a man....
     
  10. LtRoarke

    LtRoarke Guest

    I disagree. Although the child may not physically be inside the male, it is emotionally inside him. Granted, some males are asses and leave the mother or just feel nothing towards the child for some reason or another, but I believe that those males who are in a healthy relationship feel some sort of attachment towards the child. I have a male friend who throughout his wife's pregnancy felt the same symptoms she did, right down to the morning sickness. I have another friend who was-and is-not with the mother of his child when his son was born and you wouldn't believe how excited he was when he found out he was going to be a daddy. He changed his life arounda full 360 degrees, and if that child wasn't inside him I don't know what was.

    Now, in regards to the orginal thread question-I am so not child-free. I don't have children, nor do I plan on having them for at least 2 years, but nonetheless I cannot wait to have children.
     
  11. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    So figurativly I can see a baby being inside a male. But in the end it is all in their heads. They learned about what was going to happen nad they made it happen to them.

    Also they would have to have some small desire to have kids. I know that if they did not want to have the kid they would not have felt that way.
     
  12. immure

    immure Account Closed

    "But in the end it is all in their heads"


    hahaha litterly u are right. just thought that was a pretty good one.
     
  13. Isa

    Isa Well-Known Member

    I like polls
     
  14. nobodyknowsbutme

    nobodyknowsbutme New Member

    i dont have children and this became a HUGE issue in my last relationship. my boyfriend had two children from two different women.
    that really bothered me because it just showed a lack of responsibilty. i dont think you should bring a child into this world if you have nothing to offer him/her. my boyfriend said that what he did wasnt so serious because "it just happened" if that doesnt show how immature his mindstate was, i dont know what does. people like that piss me off. to be so self absorbed enough to just practice unsafe sex with everyone... i cant even finish what else i was going to say because i just made myself mad.
    im saving having children until i am married.
     
  15. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Trust me you are not the only one who feels that way. I am glad to see someone is level headed about it. Maybe people I know have kids just because they practice unsafe sex. Some of them, like my dad, try to duck out of responsiblity. Others, like my online friend, convince themselves it is a miracle. It is a mistake nothing more nothing less.
     
  16. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    No it isn't :dry:
     
  17. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Oh come on... lighten up...it is very funny...

    Sad but it is true why do you think people reproduced during the dark ages? Cause they WANTED the kids?
     
  18. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    You think using your own, or indeed, anyone's kids for cheap labour is FUNNY?!?

    :mad: :thatsit: :rant:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 5, 2006
  19. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    What? Why do you think parents make kids do chores? Because they don't want to do the chores themselves. Get this for YEARS I have been telling my mom and step-dad we need a new lawnmower. And did they listen NO because they were using me as a source of labor so they could piddle away their time in their garden. Not to mention the fact that they made me do mundame chores like scrubbing the baseboards their laundry vacuming dusting washing the doors refinishing the decks. And then when I could drive I was in charge of my siblings lives. You know drive them to practice drive them home take their friends to the movies. Clean out the car wash the car. And all they had to do was feed me not beat me and give me a bed.
     
  20. BlackPegasus

    BlackPegasus Well-Known Member

    Okay it's true in the old days one of the reason was for labor on farms and also due to high risk of death by disease. But many also did it because they loved children and wanted them. I know parents who are lazy and make the kids take on all the adult jobs. But that is wrong. Chores should be about teaching responsibility.

    As far as population. Yes eventually restrictions will need to be made and for a long time I did not want children for this reason.

    Mia
     
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