christmas is sooooooooo hard....
- Thread starter incombustible2000
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i dont see the point of christmas anymore its a time where family give you presents as in oh ile buy your love gifts and everything is all made up for. you sit through at least a month of 'christmas cheer' and the stupid 'jolly' songs. While all the time your missing and feeling guilty about someone special who you know you cant have only in death but you feel like you need to make it up to them somehow for ruining their life. You watch everyone pretending to be happy and the people that really are longing you could be one of them and it distances you more from people. you see people getting christmas cards and you getting none. Christmas is aimed at people who have lots of people and those that have none are made to feel even more loney and excluded this time of year sucks and it gets me down even more. christmas is about making money for companies and making those already popular people look more popular and excluding you to show you can never be one of them.
With friends family and work i hope i can get to the new year.
If i can then i know i have at lest some strength to carry on.
It be my first christmas with out my cheating wife for 10 years and i know it be bloody hard.
But one thing gets me so pissed off all my family and friends telling to get a grip and think of others.
So i am ment to keep living feeling like shit in pain with all the feelings and hurt just to keep them happy.
sorry just had to ler rip a bit.
If i can then i know i have at lest some strength to carry on.
It be my first christmas with out my cheating wife for 10 years and i know it be bloody hard.
But one thing gets me so pissed off all my family and friends telling to get a grip and think of others.
So i am ment to keep living feeling like shit in pain with all the feelings and hurt just to keep them happy.
sorry just had to ler rip a bit.
R
alone or in bad company dont see where the difference is.... seeing faces and movement perhaps?
no jolly songs, no people to look up to, no warmth, no hugging no gifts no nothing this year, just the like of me popping in the mirror to see a sad smile once in a while if i manage to.
how lovely having family afar........ hurra (got to cheer myself a little)
:sad:
no jolly songs, no people to look up to, no warmth, no hugging no gifts no nothing this year, just the like of me popping in the mirror to see a sad smile once in a while if i manage to.
how lovely having family afar........ hurra (got to cheer myself a little)
:sad:
yeah, it's the worst time for me too. especially when i think about all those happy people who are loved. also my poor sister who is a little angel is fighting an extremely painful illness. we lost our mother and brother to suicide. our father died 10 years ago. to see the sole survivor of my family besides me suffering as she does breaks my already broken heart
there is no God for some of us.
there is no God for some of us.
Don't know what my best friend is going to do for Xmas. She has a hard time with her father and would rather be alone. She's full of depression and anxiety, she hates her father so much. I wish I didn't have to work the day before Christmas so I could help her with what's going on. Work sucks as usual.
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