Chuck norris

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Kaos General, Jun 27, 2010.

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  1. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    This is for all your funny chuck norris quotes

    God took seven days to create the earth and everything in it. Chuck Norris took one day to create God.
     
  2. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
     
  3. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.
     
  4. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
     
  5. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Chuck Norris was originally offered the role as Frodo in Lord of the Rings. He declined because, "Only a pussy would need three movies to destroy a piece of jewelery."
     
  6. bluegrey

    bluegrey Antiquities Friend

    Chuck Norris doesn't sleep.............he waits. :gun::nunchuk:
     
  7. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
     
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