I was prescribed Citalopram this week and not had any experience of antidepressants, except for Prozac years ago and it gave me migraines so I stopped after a week. I went to the doctors, and she knows me fairly well, knows what my husband is like so one thing lead to another and I heard myself, in tears, telling her I often think of suicide and probably would do it if anything happened to my youngest son. (Even as the words came out there was a little voice saying WTAF are you saying!). So anyway she said I could use therapy and alsoprescribed Citalopram. She knows about my migraines but just said that there is some contraindication with migraine medication which worried me as I'm getting them quite often at the moment. Since I'm short and not overweight, I decided to start on half a tablet for a couple of days and see if I felt anything (physically). I took it at night and straight away I knew I wasn't going to sleep. Maybe I was just over tired but I seemed to wake up again. I was awake for most of the night and then I noticed shooting pains in my ankles. In the morning I felt like a zombie with a sore head. It felt like every bone was slightly aching but especially my jaw. I know you are supposed to give them a few weeks but is that normal?? I could barely get out of bed. Is that an indication straight off that they are not for me?? I couldn't imagine having to work through feeling like that? Secondly, with the therapy, I know I have unresolved abandonment issues from when I was left twice in my childhood and teens and I still feel pretty angry about it. But I said I didn't want to go to a therapist because I've dealt with it for so long now, I don't feel anything is going to change and it just brings on the tears talking about it. I don't expect a stranger can begin to understand the feelings I had/have and anyway, what can they do except tell me to love myself, move on etc? I don't really want to lift that lid. It won't take away what happened, it won't delete all the files. I don't know... just musing.