Well today i've recieved my first box of anti-depressents. Citalopram. The doctor says they top up those happy chemicals, im needing ^_^ Yay. Well not quite.

I've never liked the idea of anti-depressents, happiness in a pill, it just seems to easy. Its like when you have back pain, and the doctor just gives you pain killers, thats not getting rid of the pain, its only masking it. The same way this pill is going to make me feel like im happy, when im not. My 'citowhatever' levels are down for a reason, because something is making me unhappy. Getting to the root of this problem is my cure, not a stupid pill. But hey, im too tired to fight, too tired to argue. If it works then so be it, ill give into society.

They Win. I Lose.

And something totally off topic, my mum comes in my room to do something, and she askes me 'Did you use my suitcase?' And i say 'yeah, oh and i broke the handle,' so she goes 'how?' and im like 'i dunno when i was going from the airport to his house' and shes like 'how?' and im like 'i dunno i dont rememeber' and then shes all ready to go crazy on me. GET OVER IT. Its broken, no matter how i broke it, its still going to be broken! Why does she need to know why it broke, to ease her fucking mind? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!

Goodnight Everyone. x


Staff Alumni
i was on citalopram a while ago but it wasnt helpful to me, give it a try tho, anti depressants dovt actually make you happy, they make things easier by uping the level of some chemicals in your brain and some also relieve what i think are called depressive symptoms, like tiredness

i do agree tho that just being on pills, while it can help a little, wont make things 100% better, maybe you should talk to your doctor about getting a therapist or someone to help you out a bit more (?)

i understand about your mum, if its broke its broke! some people can be like that i guess, just tell them the dog did it :wink: :hug: i hope you feel better soon :hug:


Staff Alumni
I think that you are right about ad's... but my rationale was always that I would take them in order to get to the point where I was strong enough to deal with the stuff which had caused the depression. Not ever really worked for me though... and I was on citalopram and did nothing for me but everyone's reaction to meds is different... what doesn't work for one does for someone else so worth a go.


Antiquitie's Friend
I agree with you about caution of masking the 'real' person inside. But, I have always tried things out...I hate taking pills!!! Yet, I will try and see if it does make my life more bearable, or so I can stop crying long enough to not use all the tissues in the box.
Also, if you start meds while you are young, find a formula or good mix for you, the needs may change as you age or your chemicals adjust. There are always new ways to treat bi-polar and depression. I hope I will find a good med to help me get to the bottom of my evil side.
Let us know how you progress.
I dont think its doing anything anymore, Im on day four now, and i dont feel numb anymore i feel exactly the same as i did before i took it, just now im always tired and my jaw doesnt stop quivering! Lol...but we'll see how it goes..
The joys of being sick...


New Member
citalopram can take a few weeks before you feel any benefit.. keep trying, it might help you get to the point where you are strong enough to deal with why you're feeling this way,

Good Luck

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