Well I've had the final pushes I can handle and I know that I'm not meant to be here anymore. I've skipped classes for the last 3 days and although I wasn't necessarily happy, I wasn't as down either. But now I have another assignment due tomorrow and I have no idea how to do it (yes, partly because I didn't go to the classes) and neither does the one person I know in the class (who did go). I don't know why I'm even still trying at school anyways. I just don't have the mental motivation you need to do well and that's not going to just change instantaneously. Just talked to my dad and I hear the same aggravation I hear in mom's voice when I talk to her. I'm supposed to just get through it. I'm supposed to drop my "bad attitude" and do better. I can't. And I really have become someone that shouldn't be around. I'm negative, mean and a drain on everyone around me. I have a ton of thoughts but I'll just say thank you to those that replied to my posts. It was insightful to read about others views.