Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Entoloma43, Apr 19, 2009.

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  1. Entoloma43

    Entoloma43 Well-Known Member

    I was recently accepted into college, however, there are a few problems.

    - Uncertainty: I don't know anything about college or how it works and whatnot, nor do I know what major to go in.

    - Don't know if I have the mental strength or determination to go back to school. I had suicidal fantasy's and thoughts in 10th grade (that's as early as I can remember, dunno if I had any in 9th). I attempted suicide in 11th grade (was 16 at the time), then was planning to try again in 12th grade [with pretty much 99% guarantee success method] but then I transferred to a private school and things were a lot better since it was easy.

    - Math sucks, and I suck at it.

    I just have a feeling I'm going to go to college, hate then, then just kill myself. I would have killed myself long ago if I was able to legally purchase a gun, and now that I'm 19, I can buy rifles and shotguns, and have the money to do so.
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    I think being uncertain and scared about a big change like this is very normal.

    Maybe it's worth calling the college that you want to go to and finding out about the things you are concerned about. It might also be worth asking about their student support services because you definitely sound like you need some support.

    At the end of the day though, college is a choice, and if you don't want to go, you don't have to, or if you want to leave, that's ok too. There are plenty of opportunities in life when it comes to your future.
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    First of all, huge congrats on getting into college!!

    Your first few semesters of college will probably be just general courses; so you can pick a major that interests you, but you can always change it once you've taken a few classes. I switched my major twice, and it was no big deal because I did it early on.

    My suggestion would be to start off with a lighter courseload to give yourself a chance to adapt to being in college. Don't overload your schedule during the first semester.

    I hear you about math. I'm horrible at it!! I had to take a beginner math course in college to prep me for college math. I didn't get credit for the beginner course, but it was worth it to get caught up. Ugh, I HATE math!!!!

    Most colleges have some pretty decent student support services, so like Scum mentioned, it'd be worth giving them a call to see what they offer. And if it proves to be too much, that's okay! It's your choice whether you go or not, and there's plenty you can do with your life even if you don't go to college.
  4. Entoloma43

    Entoloma43 Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the replies.

    I plan to take it slow at first - not go full time. I guess we'll see what happens.
  5. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    Taking it slow sounds like a good idea.
    Don't do it if you're not realistically able at the moment. Know your limits and if it gets too much to handle because of your suicidal thoughts then it would be better to leave or drop a class then lose your life.
    But I hope that doesn't happen either way. Taking it slow definitely sounds good and I'm sure you'll do great :D
  6. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    you could always start by going to jr college and getting some of your required courses out of the way...
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