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Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by mpang123, Jan 30, 2014.

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  1. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    Well, I told my pdoc that I want to be in a coma. She was upset that I shouldn't be wanting that because that is no fun to just be a vegetable and she told me my thoughts are not healthy and I need serious counseling about my desire to be in a coma. I've been thinking about what she said, and now I know why I said that. Being in a coma is almost like death. All my adult life I wished to be dead and that's the closest I can ever come near to death by being in a coma. I've been glamorizing my near-death experience because I was almost successful to be dead. I don't want to die right now but I don't know how to live. I am confused right now and can't think. I need to ground myself and stay in the present, not reminiscing and regretting the past and not to be fearful of the uncertainty of the future. Just be in the here and now. That's all I can do.
  2. Blacky

    Blacky Well-Known Member

    Yes, you can only stay in the present. I mean, many people want to change the past just a little bit and than go on,
    but all we can do is change the now. Same with the future.
    I wish I could give you a hug right now, but i know things will get better for you, believe me :) :hug:
  3. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    I do understand what you are saying, mpang. I am so very glad you told your therapist. For me it is just trying to be out of pain. Not that I want to die. I just want the pain to stop. And I can think of no other way for that to happen. Thus thoughts of death. Although for me death is honestly not an option. Grounding is really helpful. Not easy. But very helpful :hug:
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I can totally understand where you are coming from. I was in a coma in 2011 and there have been times after that when I wished I still was in a coma. Not now thankfully but there were times. I agree with your psychiatrist that you do need counselling or psychotherapy to help you deal with these dark thoughts. Try not to let them get out of hand. Good luck to you.
  5. mark b

    mark b Well-Known Member

    a coma will not do anything to fix the problems , whatever they are.

    i pray that i could go back.in time....just a year....but that wont happen. so its for now and future. just to do everything even more ' right' wherever i am able.

    perhaps you can too.
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