My father once told me that when i was only about one month he would stand on the corner and beg for quarters just so I could eat that night. I was moved to tears when he told me this because I never thought my dad could do such a selfless thing, especially for me. I am the first born out of my four other siblings but I am the only one that is beaten. For a while there my father totally ignored by existence. The beatings stopped but my father made it so I was the outcast of the family. My own siblings were told not to speak to me so they had to sneak and talk to me whenever he left the room or went to work. My mother who could have left my dad years ago just pretended like she didn’t see anything happening. So for about 2 years I was a stranger in my own home. I had to sneak and eat and whatever clothes I owned then were the only clothes I had for those two years which wasn’t much. Every night I cried myself to sleep until one day the beatings started again. I cant even explain how grateful I was. He was acknowledging me again.I felt like i belonged again. Now when i look back on that i am sickened to know i was so twisted by him that i actually found solace in his abuse.