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Coming to terms

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by ~PinkElephants~, Aug 5, 2008.

  1. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    It'll be one month tomorrow since Laura passed away. They will never know 100% what happened, but they have concluded that she most likely didn't fall asleep at the wheel. The tire marks where she had swerved were to sharp for someone who fell asleep. They now think that she possibly swerved to miss an animal, they think a deer because they are popular around that area. Other than that they will never know what really happened.

    My brother has gone to the scene of the accident. He said you could see the tire tracks and you could see debris all on the side of the road. I don't know how he's coping at the moment. He's talked to me a bit and he's angry it seems. He's just pissed off at the world, at god, etc. for taking her away from him. He told me she was the best thing that ever happened to him. She had gotten him to stop gambling, they were going ot start a life. He thought for awhile she was pregnant, but she wasn't. They were going ot have a life together and as much as it makes me happy that Dylan's not moving out now it pains me to know it's at such a high cost. She didn't deserve to die.

    Shaun doesn't sleep much, nightmares mostly consume his sleep. He told me about them and they have no relevance to Laura but they are definitely scary. It's more about him dying and him being attacked by people physically. It's hard to say whether he'll be okay. I know time heals all wounds but this one right now is a big gaping wound that is severly infected.

    As for Dylan. He has his moments. He is torn to shreds when he thinks about her. It will be random and he'll burst into tears. He'll be doing something and remember something they did or something she got him and he'll cry. The other day cleaning his room he found the towel he got from her when she went to her cheerleading competitions in Florida. He looked at it and was like I'd rather have Laura then this stupid towel. I can't contend with those feelings. I can't make him truly understand it will eventually be okay. He is the type of child that holds onto things forever. He will never forget her which I don't want but I want him to be able to look at things and remember the happy times they had together and not her death only.

    He was excellent at the service and funeral. He rubbed her arm, I think trying to wake her up or to see what she felt like but he cried. He burst into tears when he saw his dad cry. He also cried when we really had to go from the funeral home. It breaks my heart to know that Dylan has to suffer once again at such a young age.

    I hope he realizes wherever Laura is(b/c I'm not such a firm believer in God) she will always love him no matter what. He calls her his Guardian Angel..and I believe he believes it adn I want that for him. I want him to be at peace. Both him and Shaun.

    Rest in Peace Laura. You are loved and not forgotten. <3
  2. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    :hug: :hug:
    I hope that you are coping with it all too, Kells.
  3. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    I don't really feel I have anything to come to terms with anymore b/c we weren't as close as Shaun or Dylan were, you know? I feel for them more than anything. Thanks for the reply hun :hug:
  4. patacake

    patacake Well-Known Member

    kelly nni

    im thinking of u and ur family , im here if u need me hunni *hug

    jo xx
  5. shazzer

    shazzer Well-Known Member

    Thinking of you *hug
  6. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    Thanks patacake and shazzer :hug: means alot.
  7. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Im sorry for your loss, take care of yourself also in this hard time. My thoughts and prayers are with you. :hug:
  8. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    Thank you. Means alot :hug: Even though I doubt god listens to prayers...thank you anyways.
  9. JBird

    JBird Well-Known Member

    :hug: for both you and dylan. i got dylan a random painting for him, will send it along with your bits soon.

    :wub: beaky x
  10. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I'm sorry about your friend Laura.