Hi Not many people in my life know this and I suppose my family deal with it in there own way. I have, had? A sister who was born prematurely before my first birthday. She died a few days later so I never met her. The thing is I think I love her, I'm not sure because I never met her. How can you love some one you never met or won't even meet? I have her baby picture and cry everytime I look at it. I can't help but feel angry that she was taken away. I have 5 other sisters and don't get on with any of them, I feel that if we had had the chance she would of been the one to want to be around me. Crazy I know but we were born so close together I like to imagine we would of had similar tastes, likes, dislikes. I would of had some one I could confide in, talk to. May be then I wouldn't feel so lonely all the time. But then I feel guilty because I should just let her go, I should let her rest in peace. I don't mean to forget but to stop putting my expectations onto her memory. The reality of the situation is I will never know what she was like or whether she would even like me. I just like to imagine there was a possibility there would be some one I could feel comfortable with and actually wanted me around. The worst thing for me is I can't visit her resting place, she was buried in a paupers grave and I have been told others would of been placed on top. I don't even know if they empty these graves out eventually so they can reuse them. I would like to find her and give her a proper burial but it was so long ago I think it would be impossible now. I won't ever forget her, my family have said things lately that makes me fairly certain they have forgotten her but I refuse to. Is it wrong of me not being able to let her go? Is this normal? If this is in the wrong area please feel free to move it.