I really have no hope anymore whatsoever. I ended up in the ICU last night because apparently I took a lot of pills (i don't remember much). So then I ask for a phone to call my fiance, and his mother answered and told me to never call there again. So when I got home I sent him a message on facebook to try to piece together my night but all he could say was, "this is it, we're over." I almost threw up hearing those words. the "love of my life" didn't come support me when I was in the hospital even though every time he ended up there. He's been online telling everyone I'm the scum of the earth and there's nothing I can do about it. I wish I had've died last night in the ER, I really do. So since apparently overdosing won't kill me I'll just have to find another way. I can't live another day feeling like this.