Confused and hurt

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Whattodo, Apr 24, 2016.

  1. Whattodo

    Whattodo New Member

    i am not sure if this is the right place to go but I am struggle and confused and wanted to ask for so help. My boyfriend of 3.5 year tried to commit suicide this past month. He came home and everything was different. I have tried being there for him but I don't know how. He recently told me that he wasn't sure if he want to be with me. He said he is in a weird place and is confused. I don't know what to do. He says he loves me but it seems like all he can do is focus on the negitive things about our relationship. He shows lots of anger to me. It has been so hard not knowing what to do or say to him. Our relationship has had problem but most of the time we are happy until his depression came. I just feel so lost. I don't know if I should leave or stay. We are living together and have been for 2 years. I am so afraid of losing him.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    *hugs* Welcome to the forum, does your boyfriend have a diagnosis professionaly? Is he in therapy and taking medications? I am sorry you are in this situation, it sounds very difficult. We are here to help and will to the best of our ability. Make sure he knows you're there for him and that ye can share anything. I hope he gets well soon.
  3. Whattodo

    Whattodo New Member

    Thank you He has been prescribed a new medication and just started it at the same time his doctors are slowly taking him off his other medication. He will be seeing a therapist in about a week.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    That is good :) Therapy can help so much, I am currently in therapy too :) It helps a lot and maybe as time goes on he might include you in his therapy or appointments. I'm sorry you're struggling right now, I hope the new medication change helps him, please not that anti depressants can take 6-8 weeks to work so you need to be patient. You yourself need support to help him through this and you will certainly find that here but hope you will be okay and things sort themselves out, good luck.
  5. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    Hi, and welcome to the forum.

    I'm sorry to hear about your boyfriend, but I'm happy that he is still here, and that you are standing by him and supporting him. He's very lucky to have you!
    I am also happy to hear he is starting therapy, I really hope, and I do think it will help him.

    You should know the anger is most likely not charged at you, but comes from his mental pain; just be there for him, like you already are!
    But do take care of yourself too. It can be very difficult to date someone who suffers, my boyfriend struggles a lot, and have been very suicidal at the start of our relationship... it was very difficult to deal with. So don't forget yourself as well!
  6. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN SF Author

    Relationships where one of the people is depressed and suicidal are incredibly difficult. Not only because of the confusion when the person you love seems to become someone else, but also because of the fear they may, in fact, kill themselves. That kind of fear is horrible and you need to make sure that you are taking care of yourself, as well as him - and that you have your own support network. You need to remember that YOU deserve to be happy. He needs time and he needs therapy - but depression is not an excuse for him to be angry toward you or to treat you badly. Depression doesn't stop him being in control of himself - so remember that you deserve to be treated properly. I am not suggesting you get into a fight about it, but it might be worth a couple of sessions of therapy together if he would be open to that.

    Keep talking to us *hugs*
    Petal likes this.
  7. Inspire&Inquire

    Inspire&Inquire SF Supporter

    Maybe he's trying to push you away.
  8. Whattodo

    Whattodo New Member

    My support system is 2 hours away. My friend came up and he is taking back home so I can be with my family. I feel bad about leaving but my boyfriends seems to not care. I feel selfish I have PTSD, GAD and depression. For the most part I have kept this under control with therapy and support it is just hard in this situation. I truly love him we thought and have talked about marriage. I feel like I am losing so much