Confused if anything I say ever does any good..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by cutiepie132, Aug 12, 2011.

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  1. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    Have any of you been able to come to this forum and find yourself able to build up enough courage to try to fight for your life, instead of giving up? Did you find it helpful to talk? Is is possible to get through to someone who thinks death is the only answer? Has it made you think twice, does it ever change your mind having someone to talk to who knows what your going through?

    I would hope it makes some kind a difference. It's really hard to talk to people, whom are telling you that they are going to end their life, today, or tomorrow, or a week from now. For all of you that have been in this for the long run, if you have ever had to see that person never return to this forum, I am so sorry. If I see that happen to someone that I have been talking to, I know it's going to tear my heart to shreds. I already feel like going to my room and crying myself to sleep right now.

    This is a tough place to be.. I didn't realize the impact it would have. I hate to see anyone hurting, suffering, in any kind of pain whatsover, physically, or emotionally. If I could do anything to take that away for anyone here, I sware that I would. For we may have never met, but it doesn't matter, you have become an important part in my life, and what I want, more than anything, is to see you pull through this.
     
  2. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    I think i feel the same way you do. When i first came onto this site, i asked myself "how on earth am i going to convince someone not to kill themselves? and i have to do it over the internet. Doing it in real life is hard enough."

    I know when i was suicidal, my mind was set on suicide, and nothing anybody said could convince me otherwise.

    Then i realized a few months ago, that in order to talk someone down from the ledge (a hypothetical ledge), you just have to convince them to stay alive for one more day, not for decades or some ridiculous amount of time. I realized that there isn't a magic word or phrase to make someone want to live again. You have to connect to them enough to get them off the ledge, and when that happens, the real work begins to help them get to the root of their problems.

    I feel like i digressed a little from the original question, but yes, i do think people benefit form this site. I personally don't know because i found this site after I got help for my depression, and the suicide thoughts were going away. But if i had posted something during my darkest hours, i would like to believe it would've had an impact on me.
     
  3. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    Thank you for sharing that, I needed to here something positive today, even if I am being selfish by asking what I did. I know it helps me tremendously to have someone to talk to who understands.
     
  4. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    Hey cutiepie

    Yes - you can find courage here - because for me I knew nobody who I could talk to about this - I mean share things.

    So I have been here for 8 months and feel better.

    I never planned to share anything but it does help. I'm 46 and have never said anything to a living soul. Shared a little with family - but more so here - and also have a sponsor who is very kind and patient with me indeed! I mean - I can email and share things on my mind and its a two-way deal you can make when you know someone better.

    You could even make friends here - but obviously it takes time and if you do it through PM it is safe!

    The main thing is to feel accepted here - because with depression its like your living on the fringe of social happenings sometimes. You feel awkward having this darkness to bear.

    And its important to try and cheer others up - but do not overdo it.

    Anyhow cutiepie - you have a real positive attitude - and are a real caring person and I do hope that your stay here sees your confidence increase and your understanding of depression helps you find strategies for coping.

    I wish you happiness, love, friendship, long life and health!

    You make me want to live because the worlds a nicer place with people like you.

    Do stay around!

    Regards!

    Here - have this spinning thing......... :pokeball:

    Its a pokeball - but is that pokemon?

    Well its free so enjoy.
     
  5. roscho

    roscho Well-Known Member

    CP,

    I see you saying good and helpful things to people everyday. You are important and needed here.

    Some people will come and go and we'll never know if we made a difference. Some people we'll see the collective "we" made a big difference. And every once in a while, it will be only you that made the difference.
     
  6. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    Well a poke ball is used for catching and storing pokemon.. So yes, it's pokemon. And peacelovingguy, I have never had anyone say anything so nice to me, that means alot, thank you for doing so.. my heart literally melted when I read that, how unbelievably sweet, and those words from a guy (wow that is amazing) lolll. I just love that quality in someone.. Your the one that makes the world a better place to be. :hugtackles:

    Thanks roscho, for that inspiration.. I'm not going anywhere, and I hope we can make a difference.

    I know if depression hits me hard again, I'll have you all to rely on to help me, and that means the world to me. I don't have that with anyone in my life. I have to pretend I'm happy even if I'm not. I can't share things because it usually blows up in my face, I get talked to like a dog for being upset or so sick that I can't get up out of bed. If I need to cry, I make sure I do it when I am alone.. There is just no one to share my feelings with. They aren't supportive when the going gets tough.. But anything negative that I endure from life, somehow seems to make me stronger.
     
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