Well I've been making an effort to try to be a little more social (and I thank everyone who responded to my thread). I read posts here and I feel I don't belong because I've wanted to kill myself but what I don't understand is I just don't feel anything. I am so down and depressed but I just can't get angry, or hurt, or even cry. It's just a deadness and silence. I'm very confused about who I am. Nothing physically wrong with me, there's much to be happy about but I just want this to end. No one has ever suspected anything of me because outside I'm existing and moving on but inside there's only desolation. And I hate my medication, I don't want to take it.