I'm about to slam deep into a crisis. Well, maybe I'm already in one? But anyway, my dissociation has been choosing days to do stuff to me. The last one was last Monday and I found myself somewhere incredibly dangerous and had a specific loud noise not brought me back to myself then I would be dead, I'm sure of that. I have posted recently here about having no hope and I truly know there is no hope for me, but I'm trying to carry on, day by day and not think about it. My dissociation has Monday marked as the next day and its a very very dangerous day for me because it will be three years since I was sectioned and 'saved', which is the perfect day to die. As well as the part that is trying to find a way through this, there is a large part of me that does want to die too, which makes it all even harder to battle. I'm going to TRY and see my doctor on Monday, or maybe talk to him at least, or someone. I could really do with some encouragement to do that please. Sorry to ask, I know I don't support here much anymore, but I'm desperate. Sorry, but thanks in advance.