Crappy kids' artwork...I almost died laughing.

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Esmeralda, Jul 1, 2007.

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  1. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    I am better than your kids.

    If you work in an office with lots of people, chances are that you work with a person who hangs pictures up that their kids have drawn. The pictures are always of some stupid flower or a tree with wheels. These pictures suck; I could draw pictures much better. In fact, I can spell, do math and run faster than your kids. So being that my skills are obviously superior to those of children, I've taken the liberty to judge art work done by other kids on the internet. I'll be assigning a grade A through F for each piece:

    [​IMG]

    Megan, age 4 First of all, I don't even know what this is. If it's supposed to be a dog, then it's the shittiest dog I've ever seen. F

    [​IMG]

    Kyle, age 8 You spelled America wrong asshole. Also, I could have sworn America's colors were red, white and blue. There's no yellow anywhere, traitor.F

    [​IMG]
    Lisa, age 6 Holy shit, I almost had a seizure when I saw this one. Three words: too many colors. Also, eggs aren't supposed to have ears, dipshit.F

    [​IMG]Cameron, age 4 Terrible. F

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    Bryce, age 10 This one wouldn't be too bad if the color were kept inside the lines, you picked a new perspective, used non-abrasive colors and asked someone with talent to paint it for you. On one hand I want to give an A for effort but... F


    I win. When I go into work next, I'm going to surprise all my co-workers and put up pictures of myself instead of their ugly kids and their inane drawings.

    More crappy children's art work:

    Crappy art #1 Crappy art #2

    4,306,512 stupid kids tried stepping to my iNsAne skills and got 0wned.

    maddox@xmission.com

    Back to how much I rule...

    © 2002 by Maddox
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 1, 2007
  2. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Continued...


    More crappy children's art work

    The premise: I can draw better, spell better, and run faster than your kids. So being that my skills are obviously superior to those of children, I've taken the liberty to judge art work done by other kids on the internet. I'll be assigning a grade A through F for each piece:


    [​IMG]

    Jon, age 8 Ding Ding! Here comes the shit-mobile. I've never seen a fire truck that needed to be shaved. I would rather be burned to death than be saved by this hairy piece of shit. F

    [​IMG]

    Rachel, age 7 That's interesting, everyone in this picture is white. Even the rainbow is white. Perhaps in an ideal world, everyone would be white isn't that right, Rachel? Or should I call you RACIST? Nice try, Hitler. F

    [​IMG]

    Jason, age 6 This one would receive an "A" if the assignment was to throw as much random shit onto a paper as poorly as you can. I've pissed patterns on snow that look more coherent than this. F

    [​IMG]

    Seth, age 4 Vrrrroooooooooooommmmmm! F

    [​IMG]

    Kelly, age 9 This was a Christmas gift from Kelly to her parents. Good job Kelly, now pack up your shit and find a foster home. If my kids tried to pass this off as a gift, they'd come home from school and find all their shit outside in a box. What a lousy gift, seriously. You give them video games and toys, and they give you some half-assed drawing with a crooked tree. I wonder how much a gift like this would set someone back. Five, maybe ten minutes to find a napkin and some markers? F


    I can't believe how much I rule. More crappy children's art work:

    Crappy art #1 Crappy art #2

    4,352,246 stupid kids tried stepping to my elite skills and got their shit ruined.

    maddox@xmission.com

    Back to how much I rule...

    © 2002 by Maddox
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 1, 2007
  3. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    :rofl:
     
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Interesting commentaries.
     
  5. Ruby

    Ruby Well-Known Member

    Hahahahaha :laugh:
     
  6. I understand that these drawings aren't meant to be works of art which are on display in fine art galleries around the world, but seriously, these drawings are drawn by children who are just starting out in creativity. Hopefully, the drawings they create in the future will improve over time, but at least these kids are trying. Whoever wrote those commentaries, ought to be a bit more polite and understanding.
     
  7. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    It's not like the children will ever see it...it's just a joke :)
     
  8. Still, it is a bit mean.
     
  9. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    :laugh: its mean but at the same time funny
     
  10. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Well, if I tried to draw something i am afraid it wouldn't look much better. :p
     
  11. Well, for those who think it's funny, I doubt you would be laughing if it was someone telling you those mean things about your drawings.
     
  12. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    :mellow: I don't think they are bad, they are just trying to be creative, and express themselves... depends on how you look at things. I don't think there is anything wrong with them myself. :huh:
     
  13. smackh2o

    smackh2o SF Supporter

    It is mean I guess. My school drawings were worse than those and if I had the guts i'de scan them in hehe. But a hairy fire engine! ROFL!!! Made my day :)
     
  14. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    If my art was that crappy, I would definitely laugh.
     
  15. I agree, I think the kids are expressing themself's quite well
     
  16. rd9671

    rd9671 Guest

    I agree with bp, it is not very funny. In fact, it is quite hurtful. Would everyone find it hilarious if he were speaking of your children? Seems to be just another instance of picking on those who cannot defend themselves.
     
  17. SmilePretty

    SmilePretty Staff Alumni

    i didnt find it very funny considering that it is already hard for some children to express their emotions and them drawing is an outlet.
    i understand that it was supposed to be a joke....but i didnt like the way you approached it i guess.
     
  18. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Oh, Lord people! Of COURSE the artwork is garbage...the kids are 5! And yes, If this were done by my kids, I would still think it is funny. No, I'm not gonna tell my kids their art blows, but it does.

    People need to get a thicker skin. Not everybody is great at everything, and that's o.k. This whole permissive attitude, calling everything some idiot throws together art is why there was a feces sculpture of the Virgin Mary on display at the MET.
     
  19. SmilePretty

    SmilePretty Staff Alumni

    you also have to realize that the kids who did those drawings could grow up to be the next picasso or monet...or whoever
     
  20. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    True...it's not time to crush their dreams just yet, but making fun of them behind their backs is o.k. I bet parents just look at the crap their kids bring home sometimes and think, "WTF?"

    I knew a Kindergarten teacher whose student wanted to draw a picture about recycling, and drew a bin into which people should put coke cans. The picture was a giant square with the word "COCK" printed on it.
     
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