Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by nobodyandeverybody, Aug 7, 2009.

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  1. nobodyandeverybody

    nobodyandeverybody Active Member

    i've been worse lately and i've been feeling like one day i'm going to crash. The odd thing is that i think i want to crash, i want to stop taking my anti-depressants and start cutting again. I miss feeling, if i stop taking my anti-depressants maybe i can become unstable enough again where i can try something again to kill myself.
  2. elvinchild

    elvinchild Well-Known Member

    I've felt the same way :-/. Like even down to wanting to be unstable enough to attempt suicide.

    I understand wanting to quit meds - I hated how numb they made me feel, and I did quit. But I'm trying to take care of myself. I've been trying to care for myself instead through the aid of a natural supplements a doctor prescribed, and learning how to calm my pain through therapy, and eating well/exercising/etc. I'm able to feel again, but I'm not stuck in absolute misery like I was before the medication or supplements/therapy. I still think about suicide a lot and struggle with my mood swings and anxiety but I am better able to handle life than before. I'm at least the teeniest bit hopeful. I hope that if you quit your meds, you try to take care of yourself too. Really, I'm not a strong supporter of psychiatric medications, but I think there are alternative ways to treat depression/mental illness.
  3. nobodyandeverybody

    nobodyandeverybody Active Member

    i want to go live in my own house and sit in a corner and cry and cut

    i wish i could talk to my doctor and get adderall or xanax because adderall really puts me up and lets me focus and i think it would help some and xanax for urges

    my dad goes with me and doesn't know i used to cut and doesn't know i went to the mental hospital when i still lived with my mom
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Could you request to speak to the doctor privately?

    Or maybe talk on the phone with the doctor?

    You need to tell him/her what you've just said here. They can't help if they don't know whats going on :hug:
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    sounds like crashing not a good thing you really should phone and get help for yourself before you hit bottom It is very hard once you hit there i know don't think ill ever get out.
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