Cringe attacks

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#1
No, I don't watch danisnotonfire on Youtube, but I do occationally watch TheFineBros's react videos, and there I learned this term.

So, I will come with a few examples of memories that make me cringe. I would really like some feedback on how you would react were you to be the other person(s) in the memories I have of me being an idiot.


I was in a school that was part of the Youth Psychiatric wing in the local hospital. (Some relevant info: My school "mates" on my non-hospital school bullied me for my physical appearence, and I was acting strangely and was maybe a little annoying.) When we went on a field trip, there was a statue (of Edvard Grieg) and the teachers wanted her to pose with it for a picture. She was reluctant and hestitated quite a while, saying "what if it comes alive?". She looked at me, and I looked away. Some time after this we were at the school and were going to watch a movie. There was a problem with it, the teacher handed the girl the remote, and with a few clicks the problem was fixed. (Here it comes) The teacher said "You have magical fingers", and because of the incident with the statue, mixed with me having just started becoming a new and "responsible" person, I said "You shouldn't say that". Teacher asked why, I did not respond, just kinda smiled. To make it clear, the girl in question was there the whole time and heard everything. If you could be so kind, put yourself in the situation of the girl and respond, honestly and without holding any punches, what would be going through your mind.

Also in school, thought not a hospital school this time: I spilled soda on the desk. That was embarrasing enought that I prayed for a heart attack or death by other means. Then, when the teacher passed around some photos, I spilled the soda again, this time on the photos. He got angry for one second, before he probably felt bad, became nice again and acted like it didn't happen. Yes, there were other students there.

Ergh I've temporarily forgotten the rest. Maybe I'll add more later if I get responses, and maybe I will even if I don't

The thing is, whenever I think of these moments, I react by thinking verbal thoughts like "I will fucking kill you you ****" and "I will bash your brains in", "I will cut off your head". These thoughts aren't consciously directed at anyone, though subconsciously they're probably directed at me.
 
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AnnieK

Well-Known Member
#2
usually i attack myself or others. in my head, sometimes out loud. when i have embarrassing moments, or cringe attacks. i can't just make a mistake, i am the mistake. don't know it that's what you're talking about, i could be way off the mark. i just cringe when i do anything wrong, or speak up for myself or others. and i hate it.
 
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