hi guys. i guess i just have some questions and hoped someone here might help.
im posting in the uk.
as you can probably tell from my profile or whatever, im a long term suicidal .. thing.
i get frequently overwhelmed with emotional painn, and the intense urge to end it. however. i know (because when i was last here i did) that i wont try. i tried 40 odd times once up on a time and every time i stopped myself out of guilt to my mum, whos already lost one kid. so i know that im too weak to do it
so my question is, if your suicidal, but your not going to commit suicide, what the fuck will the crisis team do?
at this point, 9 years into this hell, i am just honestly, and unashamedly, desperate for the drugs.
I dont drink or do illegal drugs, I dont smoke, or party or club. I dont do anything. The only thing i can do to hide from my brain is sleep. and i have to be exhausted to get to sleep or i have a panic attack, and i have nightmares.
Im so fucking tired, and I cant stop crying. Last time i posted here I was so sad because i thought it was sad that i didnt have the strength to keep living. now im heartbroken, gutwrenchingly fucked up because i dont have the strength to not.
Please, ignore the bits about suicide there, its kind of irrelevant. my question is about the c risis team. and how much emotiona lpain do you have to be in before your doctor has to concede that one person can only take so much.
i understand that ot get better i have to attack the cause, not the symptom (emotional pain) and that the drugs mask the symptom so you cant get to the cause, but im exhausted, im desperate, i am overwhlemed.
I have no one to talk to. I have precisely 2 people in my life I speak to. My mum, who is at her wits end, trying to look after me and her father who has dementia, a full time job and everything else.. and my best friend. who is dying. its 6am and i have no one to ask for help
im sick of there not being an escape button
im posting in the uk.
as you can probably tell from my profile or whatever, im a long term suicidal .. thing.
i get frequently overwhelmed with emotional painn, and the intense urge to end it. however. i know (because when i was last here i did) that i wont try. i tried 40 odd times once up on a time and every time i stopped myself out of guilt to my mum, whos already lost one kid. so i know that im too weak to do it
so my question is, if your suicidal, but your not going to commit suicide, what the fuck will the crisis team do?
at this point, 9 years into this hell, i am just honestly, and unashamedly, desperate for the drugs.
I dont drink or do illegal drugs, I dont smoke, or party or club. I dont do anything. The only thing i can do to hide from my brain is sleep. and i have to be exhausted to get to sleep or i have a panic attack, and i have nightmares.
Im so fucking tired, and I cant stop crying. Last time i posted here I was so sad because i thought it was sad that i didnt have the strength to keep living. now im heartbroken, gutwrenchingly fucked up because i dont have the strength to not.
Please, ignore the bits about suicide there, its kind of irrelevant. my question is about the c risis team. and how much emotiona lpain do you have to be in before your doctor has to concede that one person can only take so much.
i understand that ot get better i have to attack the cause, not the symptom (emotional pain) and that the drugs mask the symptom so you cant get to the cause, but im exhausted, im desperate, i am overwhlemed.
I have no one to talk to. I have precisely 2 people in my life I speak to. My mum, who is at her wits end, trying to look after me and her father who has dementia, a full time job and everything else.. and my best friend. who is dying. its 6am and i have no one to ask for help
im sick of there not being an escape button