crying wolf..

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by mandyj101, Aug 1, 2009.

  1. mandyj101

    mandyj101 Well-Known Member

    im sorry i know this sounds horrible .. i just need 2 get this out..i hope this doesnt cause controversy.. i wish i didnt think it .. but its been playing on my mind ..i feel like some ppl are 'crying wolf' recently .. i know what its like 2 feel activly suicidal and have no1 that is taking u seriously .. but i feel that some ppl here are taking advantage of the kind nature of this site ..
    i know its wrong 2 think this .. but its bugging me ..
    like someone reminded me .. u can never know how someone is actually feeling .. i understand this and i would never tell some1 something horrible..
    i dunno mabye im thinking 2 much .. i guess this is a suicide forum after all .. so generally regular members are going 2 feel suicidal alot- like myself- im not so naive 2 think they wont.. i just think prehaps some members are quite attention seeking and can sometimes be ok but want 2 feel they are wanted and cared for .. and in the process prehaps take away some of the attention that could be directed 2wards new members that need support straight away ..
  2. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    I have to agree to some degree. I know first hand you should never refer to a suicidal person as "crying wolf" as that can set someone off. Someone did that to me before & it didn't end pretty. But I can see what you mean. Although if it causes you this must distress avoid the thread or contact that person & ask.
  3. mandyj101

    mandyj101 Well-Known Member

    its not so much distress .. i try not 2 think of anyone as being attention seeking .. and reply as i would normally ..
    i would hate 2 be seen as some1 that 'decides a person isnt really in distress' and doesnt reply .. thats not me at all ..
    i do know what its like when ppl dont realise how much distress ur in was just bugging me that some ppl seem 2 be milking the kind nature of some ppl ..
    geez even writing this i feel guilty.. :/
  4. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    Don't feel guility. If anything I feel guility that people will think I'm trying to milk their good nature because of what I did & won't go to the hospital now.

    I mean if someone is saying "Im going to go kill myself in "so & so hours"" & comes back days later & still keeps at it then even I get pissed off as h*ll.

    We'll stay its circumstancial ... depending on the circumstances it's more obvious than others who's crying wolves
  5. ashes_away

    ashes_away Well-Known Member

    well you are brave to speak your mind,mandy.My first thought was to agree..I have thought the same myself.But there is something else.Two things actually..first is that I do believe its common to be suicidal one day and seemingly ok the next day..on the outside anyways.Especially in a forum where you can mask your feelings behind jokes and small talk.Secondly,I can see how some would grow used to and almost addicted ( but I do not criticize this) to seeking support when mood swings can be so sudden and often that it appears someone is insincere.I actually admire people who consistantly ask for support,knowing they will get it.
    But overall,it is a good thing to be honest about how you feel like you have been gives people a chance to offer their input and remind everyone to be aware.
  6. Necromanti

    Necromanti Well-Known Member

    Granted, there will be a lot of attention *****s, and many people who are suicidal will have mental illnesses that usually come with the package, causing them to act needy or attention-seeking.

    I can only imagine how hard it must be to try to treat everyone equally, because I know that I would (and do) get annoyed, so it is better to let those posts be. Some people experience waves of feelings as well that may strike them so intensively that they feel that they will commit the act on the spot...but then something may change or they may feel a lack of confidence and can no longer go through with it.

    The only thing that truly disgusts me is the people who obviously make joke threads to bait people. Some people are too kind-hearted to see through their lies. Those posts/threads just get instantly reported.
  7. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    I share your thoughts too. I for one see it as all wanting help.

    The part I struggle with is someone that is not really interested in learning new ways of coping or learning new ways of getting through this crap we deal with.
    We each have invaluable experiences in staying alive and that is the gift we each bring to SF. So when someone keeps talking to me without really wanting to hear ways I have used or know others have used then I wonder are they talking to me? Attention? Shock value? Am I "enabling" them? Of course I hope I will help many but have come to accept that maybe I only help one or two so can accept it if they don't feel better talking with me but wonder if my time is better spent with someone that could benefit from what I have to offer here at SF.

    I believe that care and love always show through, I know am corny but have just been touched by others and know healing is possible, so hope mine shows through to others here and will continue to offer myself to those here, even if it just them needing some attention cuz ya never know...

    Love Bambi (formerly InNeedOf)
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 1, 2009
  8. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    Well said ashes away in respect to the comment about feeling up one day & down the next. I can say personally that on days it happens by the hour or if some event has set me off. Someone may have a crisis, become suicidal & then after everybody has come to their aid & they've calmed down, they may feel guility or embarrassed to say "Oh I'm fine now". They may play it up after, & like you said the attention may become an addiction.
  9. mandyj101

    mandyj101 Well-Known Member

    thx ashes ..
    i guess its a bit of a 'no go' area of thinking .. that u can express anyhows..
    just so any1 that reads this knows tho .. i can feel fine 1 day .. and suicidal the next .. sometimes fine and suicidal in 1 day ! so i understand this aswel .. x
  10. PandorasToybox

    PandorasToybox Well-Known Member

    I totally understand what you mean by people crying wolf & taking advantage now :mad: