Cutting and New Substance Abuse

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by lifexlex, Aug 24, 2016.


Have you ever come to this unstable point?

  1. Yes

    0 vote(s)
  2. No

    0 vote(s)
  1. lifexlex

    lifexlex New Member

    I haven't cut since June 2015 just before my first major suicide attempt after consuming over <mod edit - methods>. August 21, 2016 I cut again, or at least attempted to as best I could with <Mod Edit:SH Details> I wasn't able to go deep enough to draw enough blood to achieve that cathartic release, that feeling of release or relief of seeing the blood flow down my arm, as though my anxieties and problems were flowing away. Since I have stopped taking Latuda (lurasidone) and after forgetting to refill my Lithium prescription resulting in my psychiatrist not giving me a renewal, I have become more and more unstable again. I have been diagnosed with BiPolar Type II, Major Depression, Generalized and Social Anxiety, ADHD, but now they think the BiPolar was a misdiagnosis and that I actually have Borderline Personality Disorder. I have recently tried cocaine a couple of times and since August 21st, 2016 I have tried fentanyl twice to achieve a high - some kind of good feeling to escape the instability and depression and emptiness. I'm afraid that I'll continue to chase that high to escape, and in the meanwhile cut. I ended up ordering a set of <Mod Edit:SH Details> and I'm fighting the urge to press the blade into my arm and pull it down my arm.
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 26, 2016
  2. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    This is a big reason why I don't drink alcohol. I know I'll just use it to escape my depression and anxiety.

    You should start with getting a new prescription for lithium. If you're getting worse there is no reason why they won't give you a new one. You should try to distract yourself. I typically will watch a ton of movies or tv shows, especially funny ones. I would go to the library and just pick up random movies.
  3. moxman

    moxman I am proud to call Rosie, my best friend =) Forum Pro

    Hello lifexlex, I am Mox

    Hello and thank you for joining us at SF. Thank you for sharing your story with us. The more you share the more we can help you. I invite you to read my personal story below in green. Just know you are not alone in your pain and suffering. Everyone here is battling his/her own demons. You are among friends. No one will ever insult you or ridicule you for any reason; that BS is not tolerated here. We will give you emotional support and lots of hugs. If you are feeling like you are going to hurt yourself that you will take yourself to the nearest ER and get the help you need. The help you deserve. We want you to be SAFE. If you are having a bad day or if you are upset do not hesitate to reach out to someone here at SF and we will help you the best way we can.

    What is causing you to want to cut yourself? What harm has been done to you?

    Was you stopping the Latuda, your idea or the doctors idea? I hope you were able to get your lithium refilled. Taking all of your meds on time will help you feel more stable. Why do the doctors think you have BPD and not Bipolar Type II?

    You obviously see a psychiatrist for the medication you are taking. Do you also see a counselor to help you with your emotional health?

    Do you have any type of support network you can lean on for help? i.e. friends/family?

    Take Care