I haven't cut since June 2015 just before my first major suicide attempt after consuming over <mod edit - methods>. August 21, 2016 I cut again, or at least attempted to as best I could with <Mod Edit:SH Details> I wasn't able to go deep enough to draw enough blood to achieve that cathartic release, that feeling of release or relief of seeing the blood flow down my arm, as though my anxieties and problems were flowing away. Since I have stopped taking Latuda (lurasidone) and after forgetting to refill my Lithium prescription resulting in my psychiatrist not giving me a renewal, I have become more and more unstable again. I have been diagnosed with BiPolar Type II, Major Depression, Generalized and Social Anxiety, ADHD, but now they think the BiPolar was a misdiagnosis and that I actually have Borderline Personality Disorder. I have recently tried cocaine a couple of times and since August 21st, 2016 I have tried fentanyl twice to achieve a high - some kind of good feeling to escape the instability and depression and emptiness. I'm afraid that I'll continue to chase that high to escape, and in the meanwhile cut. I ended up ordering a set of <Mod Edit:SH Details> and I'm fighting the urge to press the blade into my arm and pull it down my arm.