cutting by accident

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by morning rush, Jul 1, 2013.

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  1. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    yesterday I accidentally cut myself with a knife cutting veggies, well actually it peeled off the skin a bit, but that was enough to make me desire to cut myself. I didn't though because mom was there, but I felt like it would be nice to do it...and the knife was so sharp...but I didn't...

    later on though as I was going to sleep I kept thinking of cutting my finger off morbid can I be yet I had this big urge to do it...but didn't...

    I am so messed up..something has got to be wrong with me...
  2. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    There is nothing "wrong" with you - you were triggered and were strong. I hope you are proud of your strength and less concerned about random thoughts that come to mind late at night that try to minimize your strength and courage. :hug:
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Good for you hun for being so strong to avoid that urge it took strength to do that hugs
  4. truthhurts

    truthhurts Well-Known Member

    i can kind of relate to what you're feeling, in the sense that for the longest time now [hopefully this isn't triggering] i've wanted to stab myself [either through the arm or in my stomach, for some reason just these two areas]. i know it's dangerous and could do serious damage, just as cutting off a finger would, but i somehow can't shake this 'desire' to do it off. gladly the worst i came to with this was around two months ago when i sat down in the bathroom restraining my arm and holding a knife to it, shaking, lol, for like half an hour and then i remembered a friend told me to call her whenever i felt like hurting myself. she kinda sedated me and i calmed down, luckily. so umm, my point being, i don't really want to permanently damage myself but i guess people have unreasonable desires sometimes, i just hope you can control it and ask for help if you feel you can't do it on your own. i might've concentrated a bit much on this part alone, but whatever the case, you don't deserve this, even if you think you do. i'm glad you didn't hurt yourself that night, i know it can be really tough holding back.
    hang in there~, we're all here if you need to talk
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