cutting myself

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Emptysoul, Apr 26, 2008.

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  1. Emptysoul

    Emptysoul Well-Known Member

    Ive just cut myself for the first time in 14 years and it felt so good, it felt like the stress is flowing away with the blood thats coming from my arm. mabie this is the way to cope with my depression, it might stop me from killing myself
     
  2. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    Hurting yourself could help you cope for a while, but you´ll realise (too late i must say) that when all your problems fade and there´s nothing wrong you´ll still feel sad, suicidal, addicted to the bloody knife. Trust me there is now way in earth this can help you to improve, its an easy wayout that will close all other posible doors to feel better. You sayed in 14 years...what does it means ? you´ve done it before?
     
  3. Emptysoul

    Emptysoul Well-Known Member

    When i was 13 years i was cutting myself it was cause i couldnt cope from being bullied constantly. I suppose i was having emotional probllems like i am now but they are diff emotional probs campaired to now. diffrent types of stress.

    now its because of when i was last raped and the probs i am having now. it just feels so good. even though i know its wrong. at least im cutting on a old scar, it shouldnt show up so much when it heals
     
  4. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    i see now. Have you tried looking for counseling or medicl help? how have you been betteling with this that happened to you?
     
  5. Emptysoul

    Emptysoul Well-Known Member

    well i havent been coping i can tell you that! I took an overdose but i left out the other half of the concoction i was going to take, Ive been so sacred of going out cause i dont trust myself to keep myself safe and not drive into (or jump off) a bridge
    I should go see my doc as its the only way i can get to see a councilor thats free but I cant face it. I only seem to sleep every over day and even when i can get to sleep i wake up from nightmares and cant get back to sleep, but im never tied, I think im slowly loosing my grip on reality again and im starting to go off the rails again, and im drinking again which dosnt help, i cant call anyone cause i just cant cope with phones, mabie i'll just go jump off something, i really dont know anymore
     
  6. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    well considering the way you feelits a good thing you´ve found something to cope with, but in those moments when you feel at least a little bit better, try to find another way to cope, or this will own your feelings:)
     
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