cuttle25

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ASolitaryBlue

Well-Known Member
#82
soooo tired.
of just being, of fighting, of everything.
not looking forward to failing exams tomorrow...
...at least they got me to get the only method i have more ready to go today...
 

Allie123

Well-Known Member
#83
oh hun :hug:

for what its worth, good luck on your exams tomorrow. you're probably moer ready for your exams than you're giving yourself credit for, but even if you're not, it will be okay. exams and classes seem so big when you're right in the middle of them, but a few years from now they'll barely matter to you. i promise.

are you safe? is there anything I can do? i care about you.
 

41021

Banned Member
#84
Hey, i know it's hard :console:
i know you are so tired of fighting and struggling with this. It can be exhausting and draining. You know, you've not had much help with it either...no meds or therapist. I think you've been doing pretty well considering you've not had appropriate resources. :hug: You've been so strong, hun. You can get through this. I believe in you. You can lean on us. We will help.

ummm...hey, not a good idea sweetie with the methods. :console: i am concerned about you. You are under so much stress. :hug: None of us want to lose you. You are too important to us.

look. you do the best you can on the tests, and try to be okay with that. you are not feeling well, try to be gentle on you? You cannot be expected to perform at a tip top level when you feel like this. It is a struggle. You are doing the best you can. --and that is good enough. :console:

i am very concerned about;" ..at least they got me to get the only method i have more ready to go today..."

How can we help you be safe, so you won't turn to your method? Do you know what happens with that choice? It takes about a month if you don't get treatment. You could change your mind in a month and it could be really bad as you cannot undo things. Perhaps you could dump it...and instead come here and talk? Look, we want to keep you around. Instead of turning to your method, could you please give yourself a chance first, and reach out and talk to all of us? Could we at least get a commitment out of you that you would first talk to us?

This place can be an anchor of sorts when one is feeling like using their methods. Post on the forum, sit in the chat room. Chat is good for that. Don't sit with your method, keep it far away, and sit in chat...it can kind of ground you and help divert your attention...talk if you can. Contact some of us. Just keep talking, reaching, leaning. You deserve to give yourself a chance. You are a good person and you have a good heart. Trust me on that one.

I also think it might be helpful if you talk to Lightbeam. He can give you some really good tips and is a good hearted fellow.

:hug: xxxxxxxxx

please be safe?
 

lightbeam

Antiquities Friend
#85
Heyroo cuttle!

Just wanted to drop a line, since somehow my name came up in your thread. I have been struggling lately too. I won't go into my method either. But I take comfort that it's close by. Maybe you could find comfort with it close by, but never acting on it?

However, I've been reading through the thread, and it seems like you really could use the help. We all know what it's like to feel like you want to scream all the time. I myself have been going through that lately with a specific topic (And no, I won't bore you with that topic either). I just find that talking, and looking through all the options is important.

Just remember we are here for you hon. Drop any one of is a line, and we will answer.

Talk to you soon!

-Jason
 

ASolitaryBlue

Well-Known Member
#86
first exam wasnt a total fail...
skipping my middle class to study for chem...
but i know thats a lost cause, might as well walk in get the exam and just hand it back.
i wasnt going to bring my method with me.
agreed that i wouldnt.
but somehow its in my backpack.
not the whole thing, everything,
but enough, the main part.
enough to make it work.
i guess the voices really do look out for me after all
at least now if it doesnt work out ill have a way out...
still dont remember how it got there...
 

lightbeam

Antiquities Friend
#88
Liz, sweetie. Don't listen to the voices. They are there just to upset you.

I have voices sometimes, and they are very mean, violent.

I am going to figure that you dissociated, put the stuff in your bag, zipped it shut, and then reassociated. It's a difficult thing to accept, because most people have no memory of doing what they did.

Please be safe Liz.
 
#89
Liz, Hunni...i love you... please dont believe the voices hun :(

we all love you soooo much :cheekkiss:

please cling to us...not them :love:
 

ASolitaryBlue

Well-Known Member
#91
im tired
i cant keep fighting this
theres no point
doesnt matter if i want them to or not
theyll win
might as well accept that theyre right
and just let them do what they want
 

ASolitaryBlue

Well-Known Member
#94
i dotn know how they know
how did they get my number to call
not ok
if they come im in trouble i dont know how they knew
why theyd call
scared
not ok i cant stay here if they know
 

summerschild

Well-Known Member
#95
The voices lie sweetie. Somehow they know our worst fears and feed off of them. But don't listen to them. We are your friends and we love you and we do tell you the truth. You are a wonderful sweet kind loving person. Let us help you. Please keep talking and lean on us when the voices start up. Ignore them and listen to us. :hug: :flowers:
 

ASolitaryBlue

Well-Known Member
#96
im sorry.
im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry.
im sorry :cry: really.

i have to go now
dont know if ill come back or not
hopefully i can just stay away
and leave everything to be as it should
 
ummm hey all.
its still liz, i just changed my username from cuttle25 to what this is now, ASolitaryBlue
mostly bc im paranoid ppl from uni knew me as cuttle from other sites and could find me...
just an fyi i guess...
 
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