God fucking damn it all! I'm a failure...I can't to any damn task without botching it. I want to kill myself, but I'm a coward. I can't. I simply can't. I'm aware I'm just an unnecessary consumer of oxygen. I'm aware I only bring pain to everybody who meets me. I'm aware I'm a bringer of bad news. "Ambulo cum morte." I walk with death. Indeed I do. I brought it to my mom. I brought it to my friend. I brought it to my grandpa.... It's all my fault! And I still have the audacity to stay alive. Ajax had a point...If one can't live with honor, one can die with it. BUT I CAN'T EVEN DO THAT! Just damn it all! I don't deserve to live. NOBODY cares about me. It's all fake concern, IMO. WHY THE HELL CAN'T I JUST KILL MYSELF?!