Dangerous or no?

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Brokenness, Apr 18, 2013.

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  1. Brokenness

    Brokenness Well-Known Member

    I wanted to cut so badly last nite but was actively just forcing myself not to. I didn't, but I fantasized about it for a good two hrs before I fell asleep. I worry that fantasizing about it is a bad thing in the long run... Like it will build up into something worse I will act out. I spent time coming up with ways to make cuts look like accidents so I could lie and explain it away. I'm such a sad sack of shit :ambivalence:
  2. scarss

    scarss Member

    To start off, you aren't a sack of shit. Never think like that. I always have a hard time coming up with advice particularly for self harmers because much of it would be extremely hypocritical. Fantasizing is not as bad as doing. just remember that. I know from my own experience that once you become a "cutter" the idea of slicing your skin occupies your mind most of the time. you can't help that. you have to think of ways to distract yourself and use all the willpower you can to keep that buildup down before it turns into harming actions. we talked yesterday and i really enjoyed it. I am happy to give you some contact information if you want it. I'm always here for you.
  3. scarlettdrknss

    scarlettdrknss Well-Known Member

    you can't stop the thoughts in any way. but i would be careful about how much you fantasize about it and what exactly you fantasize. my personal experience was that if i fantasized about something a lot, if i held onto one idea, one thought, that i would do it in the end. it would kind of take over me and i would end up doing it even if i fought it off for a few days. like yesterday, i cut my wrist pretty deep even though i don't usually do that. most of my cuts heal and fade within a month. but i had had that idea in my mind for a while and thought about it so much until i had the feeling that i really really wanted to do it.
    it's good that your trying to fight self harm, keep fighting <3 you're strong enough to get past this.
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