I belong to another support forum somewhere on the internet. I've been a member there for 2 1/2 years. I've made a lot of really good friends from people I've met on the forums and in the chat room. Recently I've started to develop feelings for one of my internet friends. I told her how I feel. She gave me a long list of reasons why we could never be together. She told me that I deserved better, that I deserved someone without a bunch of problems, that I deserved someone close by since we live on opposite sides of North America. I told her I wanted her, I had my own set of problems and I'd known about hers when I fell for her, and that I was willing to fly over and visit her or pay for her to visit me since I have a job and she doesn't. Then she told me that was couldn't date me because she'd lose my friendship if I became her girlfriend. She said that she would put me in a position of power and domination, even if I didn't try and put myself there. Then she would feel like she had to do what I wanted and wouldn't trust me and so on. You see, she was in a relationship with a guy who raped her several times. He told her that because they were dating that it wasn't rape, it was just sex. I understand that she has some trust issues. She said if I lived near her then she might consider dating me, and that confused me somewhat. At this point I told her that I'd come out and visit her. Then she said I could come visit and she'd have sex with me if it made me happy but she couldn't date me. That really shocked me. I'm not trying to take advantage of her. I'd be happy staying a virgin until mariage. (Gay marriage is legal in Canada!) I don't want to date her because I want sex. I want to date her because she's herself. I don't know how to make her understand that. I don't know how to help her trust me. I don't know how to make her understand that I want to date her because of who she is personally, not because I want some sex. I really love this girl. I'm willing to do anything if it means I could be with her, without hurting her.