dating after an attempt

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by ace1972, Oct 17, 2010.

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  1. ace1972

    ace1972 Member

    Tried to take my own life on sept1, 2010 and now I am trying to move on with my life. my gf at the time of my attempt has left-no suprise-and now I am trying to start anew. my shrink has said that my depression was situational and now that I am getting a handle on my life he does not need to see my anymore and he did not even give me any meds.

    my question is when or if to bring up the fact that I made an attempt on my life?
  2. loser

    loser Well-Known Member

    Yes I would mention it. I am not sure whether this psychiatrist is helpful for you but it sounds as if you do need some support.
    Exercise can be better for depression then meds.
    There are other things you can try.
    Get out, join groups, develop interests, learn something new.
    You may be on the path of recovery already but sometimes there are setbacks.
    If they happen, ride them out, post here and give yourself a chance to move on
  3. ace1972

    ace1972 Member

    Thanks for the reply...I should say that I was given some anti depresants to begin with, but he said I did not need them. He mentioned excerise as well which I do..

    As wel I am in a structured program called Change ways. Sometimes I think that I want to drop out of the program as I am doing so well now and sept 1 happened to someone else. But I know that I need this program so I stick with it. I have made the decision to improve my life.....
  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I think something like that should be shared when you feel the time is right and there are no guidelines for that...I have shared my experiences with strangers and withheld them from ppl who know me depends on the person, the context of the conversation and the reason for sharing...J
  5. ace1972

    ace1972 Member

    sad eyes-

    good point, i do not think that I will be sharing this right away with someone. When it starts to get serious I will think about it, but I think that I should give myself permission to keep this to myself if I want to. I know one girl I am going to go out with has suicide in her family, so I will not be telling her any time soon if we connect....
  6. down-and-maybeout

    down-and-maybeout Well-Known Member

    Speaking only from my own personal experience with the opposite sex, no I would certainly not mention it. There's no need for her to know, and from my experiences you mention anything to do with mental health or suicidal tendencies and 99.99% of girls will just do a runner without a second thought.

    One thing you can't expect from a girl is emotional support, no matter how close you think you are to her. Sorry, cynical maybe, but true.
  7. ace1972

    ace1972 Member

    I tend to agree here. This is my shit to handle and I will not download it to someone else. Thats what got me into the mess. I am not going to go back there. thanks again
  8. BornAgain

    BornAgain Well-Known Member

    Most women suffer depression at least once a month, everybody has had thoughts of suiciding at some point, almost everybody knows a life of a friend or relative to be of suffering or with some kind of mental issue, people just don't talk about it, it's a stigma, so you are not someone from another planet that what you communicate to them is something strange, will scare them or make them run away, they will love to hear your story and be very connected to you.

    It is not what you say, it's how you say it, you have to say it with confidence and make them know that you changed and are putting your life together, also, make sure to tell them that you are not sure you want to tell them as you don't know if you can trust them enough (that way they will respect whatever you say without you running the risk of being hurt and will trust more in yourself), it will actually create a great connection and if it doesn't work out, you can always be friends.

    If you decide to hide it though make sure not a lot of time passes in the relationship as they may feel betrayed because you didn't trust them that big part of your life that they may need to help you sometime down the road.

    Good luck and hopefully you find a wonderful human being that will give you all that happiness that you need so much as part of your life.
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