day 2

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by liquid, Apr 11, 2011.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    so its been 48hrs since i cut out alcohol an im tearing my damn hair out. im just completely and utterly going mental. i cant focus on a damn thing, all i can think aout is a ice cold beer (or 10).

    i havent been more than 12 hours sober for about 10 years. i used to be a drug addict, giving up crack was easier than this, and thats no joke. the problem is that alcohole is so easy to get hold of. i live in london and i can get a drink within 3 mins at any time of the day/night.

    im going crazy, how long does thi last?
     
  2. loser

    loser Well-Known Member

    i am teetotal so possibly worst person you couid have to reply but so far so one else has.
    I have known alcoholics and respect and admire you for giving it up.
    I am wondering if you smoke as smoking increases tendency for addiction.
    I have heard that acupuncture helps from people who succeeded in giving up.
    Love yourself enough to work through this.
    Good luck and I hope some others pick up the thread with helpful tips and comments.
     
  3. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Hang in there, but I do suggest you go see your doc to get help over the worst of it.
    Or what about AA?
     
  4. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    thanks for your replys :)

    yes i do smoke, been smoking a LOT today. ive also been taking all the supposed craving relife fixes if read up on the net, like vit B12 and niacin. i cant really afford acupuncture, im flat broke :(

    thanks, yeah im bookin an appointment tomorrow with the doc, hopefuly he will give me some diazapam or valium. if not i know someone who will sell it to me.
    iv been to AA meetings before and to be honest i didnt like them, not to mention it meens going out of the house in the evening and walking past all the off licences, with all their tasty beer :p im weak and i know i would buy something..... got to lock myself away for a week or 2, good job im unemployed
     
  5. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Well if you're locking yourself up for a bit, please stay around the forum and pm me if needed.
    Sometimes just being able to say "I need a drink" and talking it over with someone can push the craving away, at least for a while.
     
  6. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    thanks terry, ill keep that in mind :)
     
  7. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    hi liquid, i think you are doing amazing to have gone so long without a drink...you are a better man than me (despite me being fm). all i can offer is what my doc said to me and i have no way been drinking as long as you, do you have a drink and drug rehab centre (NHS), your doc will know...my doc has asked if i want him to refer me and so far i have refused...but you may need to accept that you cant do this on your own after so long and might need some medical intervention. i would be like you with AA and its not always the answer..there are online support groups that you might find helpful, but please dont try and struggle alone ...you are doing great so far, and there is always support here so hang on..wishing you well and gl
     
  8. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    thanks icequeen
    yeah i have been to my doc, and he refered me to a rehab centre called "respond". So far they have been about as usefull as a fart in a spacesuit, of the three appointments ive had with them they have cancled 2. had to chase them up for the first one to be resheduled, the second time i thought "fuck it im going to do this on my own"

    i went to the docs again today to get some diazepan, they gave me the prescrip but the phamacy was out of stock untill tomorrow morning.... ahhhhhhhhh.... its all against me.

    ive been necking sleeping tablets all day which seems to be the next best thing. along with vitemins and anything else i can find lol

    ive thrown up twice today and i have some severe muscle cramps.... i need that valium. grrrrrrrrr
     
  9. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    :hugtackles::goodjob: i think you are doing amazing having been let down by those you turned to for help (my community mental health guy keeps saying he will ring but never does...its a bitch) so i can understand how that can p*ss you off...and still you remain strong...please see your doc as he may be able to give you meds to help you through...you have reached the point where you want to quit, dont let the system beat you now. you are clearly a strong guy to get this far...keep fighting hun..stay strong..take control back you are ready to do it...:hug:
     
  10. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    Thanks :hug:
    Yeah picked up some meds, chlordiazepoxide hydrochlorid??? diazepan basically.

    im feeling better today, yesterday was horrendus. i still got the muscle problems, i can barely walk up/down the stair coz my les are so stiff.

    urgh end already.

    i miss my daughter, i useually see her every outher day. but ive locked my self away so there is no temptation to by drink. ill go and see her at the weekend :)
     
  11. gakky1

    gakky1 Well-Known Member

    Like all addictions it does get easier. I started drinking when I was 14 and quit when I was 42, it's now been 30 months since I stopped. Sure, still think about going out and getting hammered some night but the urge luckily hasn't been strong enough yet. Good to find other activities or set a goal, when I quit didn't have a computer so I put the money that I would spend drinking, put it in a jar and within 10 weeks had enough money for a new computer, things like that can keep you motivated. Also going to places where they don't serve alcohol, there was a tea shop I used to hit often in those first few months after stopping, it helped. Always here if you need any kind of help or suggestions.
     
  12. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    Wow, welldone for quiting after so long, thats a fantastic achivement mate :thumbsup:

    I am looking forward to the extra money, i was spending about £70 a week on booze. I got some diazepan from the doc yesterday. It helps A LOT, although im a bit spaced at the moment....

    I know i can do this :)
     
  13. gakky1

    gakky1 Well-Known Member

    Sure you'll get over that spaced out feeling, probably just like taking any kind of meds. You know, another reason I didn't mention for quitting was just so tired and sick of it,:mhmm: that day after was just insane, Sundays after going out on a Friday and Saturday night was just a waste and man did I feel like crap, just so tired of that feeling and wasting a whole day, especailly when you only get 2 days off a week.:grr: Hang in there and don't get discouraged, use this thread if things start to get a bit tough.
     
  14. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    ok well its been nearly a week..... i slipped up last night and bought a beer, only a beer but im a little dissapointed with myself.
    Apart from that im doing good, i can feel some health coming back already and i feel a bit more positive (apart from the valium making me feel fucked)

    im still aching head to toe though, my muscles hurt so bad and spazm ocasionaly. but its getting better
     
  15. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    well done liquid!! a minor blip is nothing to beat yourself up over...you are doing amazing and have put the seed in my mind to give it a go...community guy suggested diazepam the other day which i poo pooed but seeing doc on weds and may discuss with him.

    keep up the good work and keep posting..its an inspiration:hug:
     
  16. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    ok well i fucked up again. ive been drinking for the last 2 days. not heavy drinking, just a can of beer here n there, had 3 today.

    I dont want to drink, but ive spent more than half my life dependant on substances to make me feel better. what im doing is cutting the things that make me feel good out. i gave up the drugs, i loved the drugs. i want to take them now. i was over a mates house yesterday (when i had three beers), there was coke, ketamin, MDMA and ghb being passed around...... GOD I WANTED IT, so damn bad, i didnt tho. But thats who i am.... i need something to numb me. i want to be out of my box all the time, being sober is shit

    This is the only thread ive created asking for support here, i might wright one up explaining more about me. I know this is a "suicide" forum, im not suicidal just looking to talk to people that understand depression and the effects it has on life......

    *sigh*
     
  17. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    lolol.... i didnt really think bout the title of this thread since its atually day 10 now hahah

    note to self: use your brain more
     
  18. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    hey liquid...day 2 day 7 who cares...you are still doing well after so long...so just regard your lapses as blips and not failures (i wish i could follow my own advice!) the fact that after so long you are still fighting makes you a winner...you have a lot to over come and sometimes the hurdles will trip you up but dont feel bad...pick yourself up, dust down and try to carry on. you make me feel weak as i dont have your strength at the mo...so please keep on fighting the demon and dont give in if sometimes he gets a shot in. you are doing great. :goodjob::cheekkiss
     
  19. liquid

    liquid Well-Known Member

    love you guys *hug
     
  20. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    hows it going?
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.