DBT

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by silent_chaos, Jul 13, 2016.

  1. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I'm half way threw, and I'm still very uncomfortable in group setting. I thought if I give it time it would get better, it's not. All its doing is causing bad anxiety which is causing me to be angry. If there is something you don't want to share out loud, well fuck you, you're going to be pushed into sharing it anyway. So now I go in with a defensive attitude not wanting to speak at all, which makes them push harder. And as far as homework goes I always seem to do it wrong. Do you realize you could have looked at it this way or that way. And they will give 5 different examples and ask dose that make sense to me. Or they will ask a bunch of questions to make a personal example of what there talking about, and have to do this every fucking week, which shows me I'm not understanding the material. In return gives me anxiety, and a lot of frustration. So it's a no win.
     
  2. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I am finding DBT difficult as well, you are not alone in that. I hate the Mindfullness as my mind ends up in places its better not to visit. Thankfully its a 6 week "taster" leading to a longer course for those who want it. I doubt I shall be going any further with it as it is not for me. Some parts are ok and I am fine with a small group environment, but I am careful what I say and say nothing if I dont feel comfortable saying it.

    Dont be bullied by therapists. Dont do homework if its too much for you or you dont understand it. Therapies do not work for everyone and if DBT is not working for you, then ask to change and try something else. Some therapies that dont work can do more damage, so be careful.
     
  3. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    My therapist says if I don't do it, I lose her as a therapist as well. I have no idea why. I guess it's all or nothing. I agreed to go after a year and a half of her talking me into it. Making it sound like a damn miracle worker.i called her this morning and told her how I feel. That all I'm doing is showing up anymore. I do the daily cards but for homework I make excuses. It's going to be wrong anyway. She said to show up anyway tomorrow and we will figure something out when I see her early next week.
     
  4. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    That is so unethical its unreal. I personally would be looking to complain to someone in a higher position. You cant treat people with mental health issues like that. It could also be a human rights issue if you are denied one treatment unless you accept another.
     
  5. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    So I talked to my therapist about DBT class. And she just said use my DBT skills to deal with the problem. Ugh.... really....shit.....
     
  6. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I showed up and shut up today. That's all I can do. I'm must have a learning disabilities or something. It's getting harder and harder. More and more confusing. It's just frustrating me. I want to fall in a deep hole with no possible way of getting out of. I literally hope I die in my sleep any time this week to not go to that class one more day.
     
  7. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    My DBT has finished now thankfully. I am not sure I will ever go back to it in more detail, but I guess never say neve right.

    Just show your face, get it out of the way and then get on with something else once its done if you really cannot abide it. Me, I am not afraid to tell the OT when I dont understand something or I think something is not right. If I am wrong I am wrong, so what, who cares. I dont argue with them, but I will discuss and am not embarrassed by any of it.
     
  8. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    he just plunges into you. And if I sit there quiet and nod my head he digs deeper. I was lucky he wasn't there today. Just the other lady. I apologized to the girls for my outburst. Last week I straight out told him shut the fuck up. I instantly regretted it for the other girls sake I think I triggered one of the girls. They got quiet, I don't think they expected that from me.
    Sometimes I ask if I don't understand but this would have taken the rest of the day. So I didn't bother. I'm going to write out a letter to my therapist and send it and not show up to the appointment. If I don't go to the class then she's dropping me as a client. So be it. I don't want to be walking on eggshell any more I don't want to self harm anymore cause of it. Or feel suicidal cause that's what it has come too.
     
  9. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Oh for sure, if its got that bad, dont go. They do need to know when to back off and some of them certainly dont.

    Is there anything else for you if you lose your therapist? Anything else you can go to that will help manage or prevent the SH and suicidal thoughts? I am trying to find somewhere local to me as my time at the group therapy sessions is coming to a end.
     
  10. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I have no idea what my options are besides County mental health that i go to now. Maybe Private but it's out of my financial rage. The therapist I have now is the only one that takes people with Medicare. All the rest take state health plan. I'm writing out my letter to my therapist now. I'll drop it off Monday. There is no point in talking with her about it anymore. Last week she told me to use my skills to talk about it. I trid be He would let me finish a freaking sentence that's when I got so frustrated and told him to shut the f up.
     
  11. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Yeah, its not a great system you have over the pond is it. So many different depts you seem to have, County, State, Federal....very odd.

    It might be worth just spending a little time looking into any options that might be available to you, if there are any. It seems a shame that you lose part/all of your support system over something like DBT, which it must be said, is not for everyone.
     
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  12. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I feel like shit so bad right now. I don't want to be a failure at something, but something has to give. This week's homework is what is pushing me over the edge. Idk any more. Idk up from down.
     
  13. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Can I help in any way? I know a little about DBT, but certainly no expert on the matter. But happy to help if at all possible.

    I dont think you should look at this as a failure. DBT is not the easiest of subjects, well thats what I found with it anyway, and I only did a foundation. Its probably just not right for you at this point in time. That could change in the future though.
     
  14. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I just can't soak anything in. I'm starting to think of have a learning disability. I'm 6 months in and know 3 of the acronyms.
    This week's homework: identify the relationship between mindfulness "how" and how the skills can impact the factor reducing interpersonal effectiveness. ( lack of skills, worrie thoughts, emotions, indecision, environment)
     
  15. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Mention Mindfulness and I run a mile. We only did a few sessions of it and I hated it. The concept is fine in theory, but its not good when I close my eyes, so I only do that when I have to sleep.

    I am not surprised you are struggling with that. That looks like double dutch to me. I would need to do some reading before even attempting to offer a reasonable answer to that one. So that makes me about as much use as a chocolate fireguard right now doesn't it.
     
  16. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    Lol you made me smile
     
  17. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Whilst I am left scratching my head o_O I really must learn not to get involved in discussions about DBT in future ;)
     
  18. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    Lol. It might be a little different in different places.
     
  19. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    So if you not being able to work that one out means you have a learning disability, where does that leave me? Senile?

    No, please dont answer that one, I am old and vulnerable!
     
  20. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    Nah. When I am ask a question I have no answer almost like stage fright. But I'm comfortable in the group. It's just I don't have an answer cause I'm not retaining anything. Just 1 of the group leading likes to test patients. Pick and dig. And it always seems like there is a wrong or right answer. So he picks and digs tell you say what he wants to hear. I'm a very quiet person. So I think it dumbfounded him when I told him to shut the fuck up. He sure and he'll didn't use his skills he immediately sad up in his chair and raised his voice.