I do not know why you wish to end it, nor does your messages make it clear as to why you've taken this decision, but I do know one thing, and that is that life has many surprises in store that you will not have seen, and will not be able to experience if you were to do as you say will, a few days from now.
Do you really think you have it so bad? Is there something you wish could be changed? I know I wish I had things differently...
Time is like sand poured in your hand, it flows between your fingers. Do you hope catch it and make it your own? In that sense, I'm just like you, I'll survive, and so will you.
I come from a proper family, I have a house, a girlfriend, a fast car, a fair amount of money... yet, I don't feel satisfied. I'm suicidal, I've been like this for 10 years or more. It's been on and off, ups and downs. I've worked hard to make my downs become ups. I understand a lot of it has something to do with small things that go on inside us, and that's where YOU need to make the decision regarding how you want this to affect you.
When you die, it affect people, many more people then you think it truly does. Did you see the latest air traffic accident with Air France flight 744? I knew no-one on board, yet I fly monthly, and it touched me. These people, they didn't ask to die. Their flight came to an abrupt end and that was it.
Would I wish to go like this? No... I do not wish to die in the seat of an airplane, and it doesn't matter if I sat in First class or Economy. You see the thing that I'm getting at, is that "voluntary" death is an action whereupon you decide this is it, and you do not wish ANYONE to have ANYTHING to do with yourself.
He11, I'm like this right now... I'm not feeling good, yet I have it all. I friggin have it all! Yet, depression and sad thoughts, they weigh down on me, that's life. Can't have it all. But amongst all the bad, there's a lot of good. I've had a bunch of great experiences as of late, many good times. So if you think this is really the end and you want to end it, why not ask yourself if there's something you still want to do. Heck, I wanna go visit another 50 countries just to tally up my count to 100, I wanna meet crazy people all around the world, doesn't really matter where they are, but I know I'll meet them.
So... why do you wish to end it? Why do you want others to know you've done it? There's a number of ways out of it. I just felt downright nasty, but I registered on this forum to see if I can "forget" my nasty feeling and perhaps help someone out of theirs. It IS your decision, and I don't know you, can't hold you in my arms, nor can I tell you to face-to-face that you need to get over it, but if you think about it, there's a lot of other ways to get over it, many more than you may thing at first.
Those who say we need to make a goal to not feel suicidal, are stupid. My goal makes me even more depressed (and no, I won't get to it in this post), but compares to all the other reasons I've seen posted, my goal is not worthy, and yours doesn't seem either.
So if you're posting on this forum a few days prior to offing yourself, then at least explain what is making you sad, and give us a proper reason to help you recovery. It's not as if we're telepathic, and believe me, I'm quite sure there's a hundred people reading this message who are just as much depressed. IT'S PART OF WHO WE ARE!
You just need to be able to determine the exact reason for your depression, and then you'll be able to overcome it. At least, this is my opinion, others may disagree and all the more power to them.
