A friend of mine committed suicide on friday. I didn't learn until this morning, I'd been camping with my Scout group.
I was sitting in class, when the teacher announced it, and it hit me like a brick to the face. The grapevine had let everyone else know about it, but I had no idea. I broke down, and I was taken to the office by the teacher, and another student, where there were a bunch of people trained to help.
They all told me cliche things I've heard before, and things I've said myself to others. I don't feel mad at them, they were just trying to help, but all I wanted was to be left alone to think.
I am home now, I walked out of the school. I just needed to get this off my chest. I've been having crying jags, and then times where I feel fine. I know I'll get over this, but it still hurts.
The worst thing is, I normally consider myself someone good at reading my friends, but I had NO idea he was suicidal, let alone depressed enough to attempt. Foolish as it sounds, and I'm expected I'll be told, I feel guilty about it.
I was sitting in class, when the teacher announced it, and it hit me like a brick to the face. The grapevine had let everyone else know about it, but I had no idea. I broke down, and I was taken to the office by the teacher, and another student, where there were a bunch of people trained to help.
They all told me cliche things I've heard before, and things I've said myself to others. I don't feel mad at them, they were just trying to help, but all I wanted was to be left alone to think.
I am home now, I walked out of the school. I just needed to get this off my chest. I've been having crying jags, and then times where I feel fine. I know I'll get over this, but it still hurts.
The worst thing is, I normally consider myself someone good at reading my friends, but I had NO idea he was suicidal, let alone depressed enough to attempt. Foolish as it sounds, and I'm expected I'll be told, I feel guilty about it.